.::Insecurities Gone Away::. pt2

Start from the beginning
                                    

"I wanna talk to you Calum...about last night." Ashton said softly as he stared out in front of him. Calum's eyes soon averted back to the pond with Ashton's.

"You know I think you're perfect right?" Ashton whispered as he looked back up at Calum's face. Calum still was staring straight ahead not dating to look into the beautiful hazel eyes.

"Everything about you is perfect. I love your eyes, hair, legs, I love your personality, I love your lips and I love your body." Ashton continued not giving Calum a chance to speak. Not that he probably would if he could.

"I hate that you think you aren't perfect and that you are "fat", because you aren't. I hate that I'm away doing god only knows what while you sit at home thinking such horrible things about yourself. Thinking you need to "lose weight" and you should "stop eating so much". I hate that I'm supposed to be here and I'm supposed to make you feel loved all the time. I'm supposed to make you feel perfect." By now Calum had tears in his eyes. He still didn't dare look at Ashton though.

"Calum, please. Just please look at me, do something. Say something." Ashton begged.

Calum tore his eyes away from the pound. The sudden movements caused a tear to be pushed out and fall slowly down his cheek.

Ashton was quick to reach up and swipe the tear away with his thumb, causing more and more tears to fall from the younger boys brown eyes.

The tears turned into full sobbing and all Ashton could do was hold him. He took Calum in his arms and practically plopped his body into his lap. Turning the boy around so he could stratal Ashton's upper legs.

"Shh, baby please calm down. It's okay. I'm not upset or anything. I love you" The elder whispered in Calum's ear trying desperately to calm him down.

" i j-just f-f-feel" Calum tried to say but failing terribly.

"It's okay Baby, take your time. Calm down, okay?" Ashton soothed as he rubbed his hand up and down the younger a back.

Calum only nuzzled his head back into Ashton's neck. He managed to completely soak the shoulder of Ashton's shirt but he didn't mind much.

"I feel like I'm n-never good enough for you. Y-you are so perfect and I feel like I could at least try and be good enough for you." Calum managed to get out before shoving his face back into Ashton's neck.

Ashton grabbed Calum's face and pulled it up out of his neck. He made him stare straight into his eyes.

"You are good enough. You are too good for me." He whispered as he pressed both of their foreheads together.

"You will always be too good for me Calum Hood. You're so perfect." He confirmed before pushing his lips up to meet Calum's. The kisses were soft and sweet and filled with love. Ashton wanted to make sure Calum really understood how much he loved him.

"Last night, in the text messages I made you promise me you would never think about yourself like that. Promise me again. Tell me right now." Ashton demanded after pulling away from the kiss.

Calum hurried and shook his head back and forth. Trying to pull himself up off of Ashton's lap. Obviously Ashton didn't let that happen though. He kept a strong grasp on his hips keeping Calum right where he was.

Calum wiggled and squirmed and let out soft cried for minutes longer. Finally giving up he dropped to Ashton's chest with a whimper.

Mumbles of "i can't" where being said probably a million times by the younger lad. Over and over.

"Calum Thomas Hood, promise me right now. Promise me you won't ever -please just don't ever think like that." Ashton pleaded with tears in his eyes. He really did hate to see the love of his life like this. All wrecked and crying, not knowing how perfect he truly is.

"I c-can't ash-ashton I'm s-sorry."

"Fine, if you won't promise me... I guess I'll just have to promise you." Ashton said as he let go of his hold on the younger hips. Calum looked up at him with a confused look.

Ashton managed to set Calum back down on the blanket beside him and reached into his jacket pocket.

Calum watched him with careful eyes, as he saw Ashton pulled a little black box out from his pocket.

Ashton twirled the small square box in his hands for a second before readjusting his body to face towards Calum's.

Ashton took a couple of deep breathes before he began speaking.

"Calum, it literally kills me to know that you don't think you're good enough for me, because like I have said and like I will continue to say for the rest of my life, you are perfect. You don't know how much you make me and others happy. When I'm around you I feel like everything is okay. I want everything to be okay for you too. I want you to love yourself the way I love you. I want you to be confident, like I know you really are. And I know it might take sometime for you to truly appreciate yourself the way I do, but I want to let you know that I'm here for you. Always. I'm going to make you feel beautiful and I'll b here to tell you you're prefect. Even if I have to tell you a million times a day to get it through your thick skull. You are perfect. " Ashton paused to take a quick break, silently thinking things over.

"I will be here forever and always. I promise." He whispered as he slowly opened the black box that held a ring inside.

Calum honestly could tell what emotion he was feeling. Happy? Excited? Sad? Nervous?

"Is that- is that a wedding ring?" Calum stuttered out. He was scared, yes. He was only 18, in his opinion way to young to he married to anyone.

"Uh no. It's a- promise ring. You know... Because I promise that one day when we are both ready we will get married and we will live the perfect life" Ashton managed to get out without to much trouble.

"Oh" Calum mumbled out.

"Is this wrong? Do you not want this?" Ashton quickly shot back with a nervous voice.

"Yes- I mean no-but yes!" Calum blurted out.

"Am I supposed to say like 'I do' or something?" Calum asked will looking into the beautiful hazel ones before him.

"Oh well uh, I'm not to sure..." Ashton replied as he rubbed the back of his neck.

Calum held out his left hand towards Ashton, implying that he wanted the ring on his finger.

Ashton offered a small smile and gently picked the the ring up with his two fingers.

He shakily went to slide the band down onto Calum's finger when he suddenly stopped.

"Do you promise?" The eldest boy whispered, implying the promise that he tried to get Calum to promise to earlier.

"I promise" The younger boy whispered back as the ring was slid down the rest of his finger.

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(A/N)

Okay wow this was bad like BRUH but whatever

This wasn't really that insecure-ish but I hope you guys liked it

Don't forget to vote/comment/share this book! Xxx

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