Star's Crossing

44: What a Man

Mare closed her eyes. Her heart raged. She was a breath from tears, and she would be damned if she cried in front of these monstrous, heartless boys. I won't waste the salt. But it was a promise on pinkies and dandelions and it meant nothing, even to her.

A tear slipped and Geoffrey's fingers tightened on her arm. Mare struck his hand away. "Bastards," she whispered, and each boy had the audacity to look aghast. "Cruel and vile. Abusers of power. Bored with yourselves and playing games with everyone else. Just like your fathers."

Teddy's eyes were bright. In the blinding sunshine, she couldn't tell if they reflected her tears. "It is not that simple."

"When did you agree?" Mare asked. She held Teddy's eyes, because this was the true question. This was the wax on the envelope; the nail in the coffin.

His expression was pleading. "Mare."

"When?"

He closed his eyes. "After we figured...after we realized..."

"That it was me," she said softly. "You loved me until you knew my name."

"I was a fool." Mare didn't imagine the tears that filled Theodore Bridge's eyes. "I was a bastard, Mare. A coward."

"And a selfish man." Mare shook her head, hands clenched into fists at her sides. "The school paper? I went to Miss Cressida and found a paper you—or one of you—wrote. I believed it was..." Mare looked to Camden, bitterness rising in her like a gale off the sea.

"I forged papers in school," admitted Camden. He straightened his coat jacket, eyes narrowed. "Had Teddy write them."

Lord above. Mare touched her lips, eyes closed. I am a fool. Star-crossed and tragic. My vices are my poison and this is how I die.

"And you," she said, turning to Geoffrey. He retreated a step, cowed no doubt by the scorn in Mare's eyes. "Why did you publish them?"

"I was protecting you," Geoffrey answered quietly. "I thought I could lead you back to them—"

"It was all a game," Mare said. She held Geoffrey's tawny eyes and refused to blink. "None of you cared for me. You followed me like hounds to see who might run me to ground first."

Teddy flinched. "Mare—"

"How was one to win?" She demanded, looking between them. "How did one become the victor?"

Teddy pressed his lips together. Camden crossed his arms.

"A kiss," Geoffrey finally said, voice fragile. "The first to kiss you."

Mare's eyes went to Teddy's. His jaw was tight, eyes pleading. "And the prize?"

"The letters," Teddy said.

"Worth ruining a woman's reputation over, I suppose?" Mare didn't care anymore that she was crying. She vowed on each tear that it was the last she would ever waste on a man. "Worth ruining a woman's prospects and dismantling her future? Why?"

All three boys lowered their gazes, but Mare was not asking for the sake of hearing the words spoken. She wanted God damned answers.

"All of it," she said. "Why? Why me? Why take my letters? Why make a game of me and my life? My heart? Was I so vain? My reputation so sullied by my name? Was I too cold or too sharp?" Mare's voice rose with every word, tears streaming from her eyes. Her momentum was only gaining, but she found she could not stop herself. "Tell me! Tell me what would compel three rich, handsome, powerful men to destroy the life of one woman!"