Hamilton Soccer Moms AU

Vacation (kinda)

"See, he's already started," Alexander whined. The bickering broke out once again until it was interrupted by a sharp piercing scream.

"JAMSIES!" Thomas screeched storming out of the bathroom. "What did you do with my hair supplies!!??!!"

"Um, I, uh, thought you packed it," James answered in a small voice. 

"I did!!" Thomas rifled through his suitcase. "But I thought you might have moved it or something!"

"That's so unfortunate," Alexander said as he nudged the trash can stuffed with Thomas' hair products further under the bed. 

Thomas glared at him suspiciously. "What did you do with them?" he growled.

"Nothing. I better go unpack. Bye!" Alexander ran up the stairs with his suitcase.

"He definitely did something with them. Liza, could you find out where he put them?" Thomas asked her.

"I'll try." She followed Alexander up the stairs, her children trailing after her. "Alex, hunny, where did you put Thomas' hair products?" she asked, walking into their room.

"I didn't touch them," Alexander answered. 

"FOUND THEM!" Thomas yelled. "Under the bed! In a trash can?"

"Mother f- puffin!" Alexander cursed. 

"Oh, you're referring to the clowns of the sea sometimes even called sea parrots. Did you know a puffin's beak changes color during the year?" Philip asked.

"What? No. Why do you know so many random facts?" Alexander asked.

"He thought that knowing random facts would impress girls," Angelica answered for him.

"That is NOT why!" Philip protested. "It was because I read a book called 'Random Facts' that I bought at the scholastic book fair." (if yall didn't have those I'm so sorry they were the best)

"Along with like twenty erasers that you'll never use," Eliza reminded him.

"That hamster one I use every day, Mom. You're just jealous."

"Sure. Anyways, Alex go down and apologize to T Jeffs," Eliza ordered.

"Well, you see, I would but that's not on the schedule. Right now, the schedule says to go to the pool and that's what I'm doing." Alexander shrugged and walked to the bathroom with his swimming trunks. 

"I don't know about you guys but I'm going to the pool." Philip ripped off his clothes and was wearing his bathing suit beneath.

"Let's wait for Dad to apologize first," Eliza suggested.

"You'll be waiting an eternity," Angelica said, also taking off her dress and revealing a barbie themed bathing suit.

"We'll be at the pool!" Philip said as the two left.

"Don't forget sunscreen!" Eliza grabbed James Alexander and Alexander Jr. and raced after them with a bottle of sunscreen. 

~The day after~

"Wake up!" Alexander yelled as he banged two pots and pans together while flickering the lights on and off.

Angelica recoiled from the light with a hiss and slithered deeper into the blankets. Philip covered his head with a pillow. Everyone in the whole suite, yelled, "Hamilton, shut up!!"

Eliza stood up, took the pot and pan, walked back to her bed, and continued to sleep with the pot and pan snuggled in with her. Alexander Jr. and James Alexander barely flinched.

"Alright guess I'll go to the volcano all by myself," Alexander said, trying to convince them.

"You will until a more reasonable hour than," Eliza glanced at the clock, "four in the morning."

"Fine."

~At a more reasonable hour~

"Hello everyone and welcome to the volcano tour. Today we will be touring the island's biggest volcano, Mauna Loa," a brunette tour guide said. "We'll have to go over some rules first. The first one is pretty obvious, no pushing people into the volcano."

She got a few laughs from this. "Not even him?" Alexander said completely serious, pointing to Thomas.

"No, sir. There is no pushing people into the volcano. It's considered murder." 

Alexander leaned over and whispered to Eliza, "We should have gone to the earlier tour that way I wouldn't have even had the temptation of pushing him into a volcano." Eliza rolled her eyes. 

She droned on about other safety rules that no one paid attention to until she got to the good part. "Alright everyone follow me up these stairs to the volcano."

They arrived at the top and the tour guide rambled off random facts. Philip maneuvered his way through the crowd to the railing of the volcano. "FOR THE HAT REVOLUTION!" he shrieked and threw a hat into the volcano. Everyone fell silent as they watched the hat fall and sizzle into the lava.

"Please don't tell me that was our son," Eliza said hopelessly.

"Who else would say that?" Alexander grimaced.

And that's how the Hamiltons were banned from any volcano in the state of Hawaii.

A/N: I need to settle something once and for all. Do you think raisins are good?