Love Me Justly

Part IV

"I got it," Leah exhaled loudly, now being the one to break the eye-contact. "You know that I'm rather free-spirited in that sense and kissed a lot of people in my life. So why not just get it over with by kissing me? Makes sense," she continued and the angry undertone was evident. "I wouldn't care, right?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying," the police officer struggled to answer because seeing Leah this upset felt awful. "That's...why I'm apologizing to you. I wasn't thinking and that's not like me at all. If I would have known that you were going to be this upset...I'm sorry. It was wrong."

"I'm not upset that you kissed me, Adla," Leah blurted out. "I'm upset because you're making it seem like it was something you had to cross off your list and it didn't matter who it was."

"I know I'm not explaining myself well but that's not what I'm saying," Adla sighed in frustration. "Of course it mattered that it was you. I mean, I've never kissed someone else before, so I felt safe in that moment. But that doesn't give me the right to act on whatever turmoil I felt and risk our friendship."

This time Leah didn't reply. Running her fingers through her hair, it was clear that the anger was subsiding and being replaced with desperation. Adla used the moment to stir the food before it burned as both fell silent for a little while.

"I'm sorry, too," Leah said a lot softer now. "And I understand. You were vulnerable and it meant a lot that you opened up to me yesterday. I don't know what it must feel like, to share something you've kept to yourself for such a long time. Honestly, if you felt safe enough to tell me that and share something as important as your first kiss with me afterwards, it's not my place to judge why you did it."

Hearing the words of genuine sympathy and understanding, Adla's tension dissolved slowly.

"I guess...it just hurt a little to think that you assumed I wouldn't care," Leah added even quieter. "But I understand what you're saying now. And I didn't mean to get angry."

"No, you have a right to be angry," Adla answered swiftly. "I completely ignored you after dragging you to Christmas from hell and then I overwhelm you with all my baggage-"

"You don't overwhelm me," the journalist interjected vehemently and gently grabbed Adla's arm in the process. "Please, don't even think like that. I'm very happy that you feel comfortable with me to talk about things that are uncomfortable. Don't...retreat again. It took me long enough to get you outside of your little shell," Leah smiled for the first time and Adla couldn't help but reciprocate. She felt goosebumps on her arm where Leah's fingers were softly lingering.

"I won't," Adla reassured sincerely. "Leah, I don't want things to change between us. Truthfully, I've never...felt this connected to someone and I don't want to mess this up."

It was still difficult for Adla to talk about her feelings but ever since she had met Leah, she made an effort. For the first time, it was important to her that Leah understood where she was coming from and how she felt. As draining as it felt with other people, it didn't in this case. Yes, it was hard to do for her but she did it willingly and gladly whenever she saw that they got closer because of it.

Leah didn't reply. The younger one pulled back her hand from Adla's arm, yet meeting the officer's gaze. Adla had always wanted the ability to read minds. First, because it would come in handy for work. But also because she spent a lot of time in her head and wondered what other people thought of all day. The casual curiosity was one thing, however in this moment, she had never wanted that ability more.

The emerald orbs were focusing intently and while Adla usually felt uncomfortable being looked at so intensely, she tried to figure out what Leah was mulling over. Obviously, it didn't work because Adla didn't have supernatural powers, but she watched the blonde's eyes dipping down to her lips before biting her own and sighing loudly.