Raise Hell

Angel face, Devil Thoughts... literally

Lucifer's POV:

Y'know those moments when you're doing nothing and actually stops a moment to review your life? Your choices, attitudes, feelings and all the baggage that you made till now?
When you stop and really think about what the hell is going on with your life and what's your next goal?

I'm going to tell you a secret, I wasn't born evil, people aren't born like this, I would know, being the devil and all I can assure you that yes, we have tendencies to do evil things and our mind is twisted, but not everyone turns out to be evil in the end. If you want to know what happens to make such a path, I'll tell you. Life happens.

You can't control it, some day, you're just going to look at yourself on the mirror and think, what the bloody hell I'm doing with my life? Why am I doing this? It's my fucking life and I can do what I fucking want. I don't need an stereotype to tell me how I should act! And that's how everything comes crashing down and our minds turns out to be completely and utterly fucked up.

Serial killers, for example, are bad people. I'm not going to say that they aren't, nor that I'm not, because we're, but have you noticed that there is always an event that triggers there murderous side?

Now, I'm not telling you that society creates the monsters within us, no, we're born with this psychopath side already on our brain, but it only comes out after shit happens.

What I'm trying to explain is, I wasn't born evil, why would God make such a creature? It's a rhetorical question, he wouldn't, but I never had the sanest mind either.

As a child I was extremely naughty, I put pranks on everyone in heaven, but they weren't hurtful, as I started to age, however, I noticed that nothing is permanent, angels aren't always good and God isn't a saint. I noticed that my family was broken in our own ways, as well as every family is.

You can't say to me that something is perfect, I'm alive for so long and I've tried to find something perfect since I was born and I never find one. You can't expect me to believe that some people are destined to each other because they would make such a perfect couple, oh far from that, darlings. That's no such a thing as perfection, it truly is a word without meaning.

Growing up as a plague for my brothers, except Gabriel, and father made me a little bitter, ok made a lot, but you can't judge me! I was only a child and they already hated me. I focused on myself, trying to be stronger, smarter, better than any of them and I am not a single bit ashamed with who I turned out to be.

I don't consider myself a hundred percent evil, if I did, I would be perfectly evil and as I said before, it can't be, if you stops to think, I punish evil! Doesn't that make me a little good? I may enjoy torturing souls a little too much, but they deserved it. It doesn't make me good, however, I'm still the devil.

As I was saying before, I wasn't always like this, I can't remember one day that God would praise me, or simply pay attention, but I only worked harder and harder to get it from him, when, suddenly, he is all lovey-dovey with humans! You can't expect me to be okay with this.

That was my trigger, it had nothing to do with my brothers, but they didn't stay by my side and I always had a temper and pride too high to say that I was wrong and live it be, so me, being my usual self, starter a war and ended casted out of my house.

The truth is that it made me stronger, I probably should thank father dearest for throwing me out, yeah... not really, but as I was saying, after I was casted our, I made my own family, my home, my throne and myself the exactly way that I wanted to be.

I didn't need to follow orders anymore, I was the one who made them. I didn't need to hide my darkest thoughts, I didn't need to be someone else to be accepted.

I'm only showing my thoughts because I know that soon enough the war will begin and I'm not sure if I will come back from it. In order to survive I would have to give up some things that I'm not ready to, so my plans end with my daughters alive and Michael dead, that's the only thing I'm sure about.

Yeah, you read it right, I may love and respect Kol, but it doesn't make him my top priority. If there was a way, I would make sure he stayed alive, but I'm not going to save him if it gets Katherine, Lilith and myself dead. I know, selfish, but I would never put someone before me that weren't my daughters.

I have a lot of things on my mind recently, not all of them are good things, almost none of them are, actually. Gabriel still didn't give me an answer and apparently the angels have been under radar. Unusual, right? My demons had the strict order to stay put in Hell too. I don't want deaths now, I need numbers if I want to win this future attack, so they can't start disappearing just to have fun.

I've been training more and more with Katherine and Lilith, they finally won Kol and the hellhounds, but they can't win me yet. I've trained with my creatures a lot too, they have gotten better and better every day, I can say that it won't be easy for Mike, that's for sure, and I will make sure to give him all my attention, wouldn't want brother dearest annoyed, right? I'll make sure to show just how much I love him!

Shall we start the apocalypse now?