Undecided

V

I walked towards him, making contact with his chest. "Hey, maybe I overdressed."

"It's fine, you look good as hell."

I blushed at his sweet compliment.

"This is beautiful Keon. Thank you so much. No man has ever done anything like this for me before. Hell, nobody ever."

"There's a first for everything right?", he said flashing his pearly whites.

I smiled up at him as he pulled my chair out and took my coat away from me. He joined me at the table, sitting in the other chair.

"For dinner we're having Chicken Cordon Bleu with rice and cheesecake for dessert with ace of spades as our drink and any fountain drink you want.", he said jokingly announcing dinner.

I laughed at his silliness. "Hmmm, sounds good, date."

"Aight, aight enough of this formal shit baby girl. How you been since you moved back home?"

I exhaled really loudly. "I don't even know. Regular, I guess. Just settling in. I mean I was only there a day before you pulled this extravagant stunt."

I rose my wine glass up to my lips, sipping my drink.

He laughed, deeply. "I never do nothing small, babygirl. That's good though. I'm happy you're getting your peace of mind back. You deserve it especially after everything you've been through. Everything we've been through."

"Thank you. Me getting over this wouldn't be possible without you and your support. Thanks for being there."

I looked into his eyes and saw he was happy with my announcement of my appreciation for him.

"No problem. Have you thought about what you were going to do about work?"

"Honestly, I can't even say right now. I feel like I chose my major in the wrong profession. I can't find work. I'm not interested anymore. I feel like the world is on my shoulders and I just- I just."

I started to get emotional so I just decided to stop talking about it. It was hard for me to be this vulnerable in front of Keon even though he had been a pillar of strength for me. I just couldn't bare it all for him and I couldn't expose my true feelings about everything.

He took my hand into his, caressing my fingers with his rough ones. "Listen, babygirl, at twenty-three, you're not supposed to know anything. Like I've told you before, you have to fall on your ass a few times. You're not even twenty-five you're not supposed to have anything figured out right now. Man at twenty-three, I was on some seriously wild shit. I can't even begin to explain some of those things to you."

That was then I realized I didn't know remotely anything about Keon. Other than the fact he was a very good father and the most amazing gentleman I've ever met besides my dad. I wanted to know more about him.

"How about you try to tell me those things? I want to get to know you better. I like you and I want to know why you are the way you are. Why you're so nice but why you can be so mean at times? Your favorite color? Your first fight? The day you lost your virginity? Anything."; I said squeezing his hand.