A Day In The Life // H.S.

33. | Hopelessly and Endlessly

I felt my eyes brimming with tears as we finally disconnected our lips, both of us out of breath. The smile on his face warmed my heart and I leaned into him.

"Chloe, you have no idea how relieved I am right now." Harry whispered into my hair, which caused me to giggle. "Relieved? You thought I wouldn't say it back?"

Harry sighed. "Sometimes, you just never know. I'm not afraid to admit that there's been times I've said I love you and the girl hasn't said it back." Harry revealed. I pulled away from him with wide eyes. "You're kidding. Who in their right mind would..." I trailed off, a bit in disbelief. Harry lightly laughed.

"There's a few of them out there. Some before I was famous, but some from while I was famous as well. But none of that matters now." He smiled down at me and my heart fluttered. As he was leaning in to kiss me again, his phone rang, causing him to frown.

"Hello?" He asked impatiently. There was a pause and then his face lit up. "That is excellent news. Thanks." He said before hanging up. "What was that?" I asked, wrapping my own arms around my body because I was getting cold. "The studio just okayed the album. I'm all set to pick a single. I have to be on the next flight to New York though. I have to meet with Asher and Jeff." He said, and I felt my heart sink.

Of course I was happy for him, but just moments after he confessed that he loved me, he was going to be jetting off to the other side of the country.

"Don't take it personally, okay love? I'll be gone for like a couple days tops. Then, when I come back, I'll be all yours." He kissed my lips gently and I couldn't help but feel sadness rise through my chest.

_____________

"I fucking win again. You still want to keep trying?" Hayley stuck her tongue out at Niall, who she had just beaten at FIFA, again. I was sitting at the kitchen island trying to get some work done. Harry had been gone for two days now, and I'd only been talking to him once a day. He'd text to see how I was in the evening before saying he had to go. It was rather odd behavior.

"Can you two shut up? I'm trying to be productive." I spat out at Hayley and Niall. "Sorry, C. We're going to go and grab some lunch. Do you want to come with?" Niall offered and I shook my head. "No. I need to work on this article. But thanks for the invite." I said before turning back to my computer screen.

I tried to focus on my work but soon realized that it was useless. I missed Harry and I wanted to know when he was coming home. I picked up my phone and dialled his number.

"Hello?" His deep voice came over the other line and I immediately felt relief flood through me. Just hearing his voice was enough. "Harry? It's Chloe." I said, out of impulse. He lightly chuckled. "Yes, I know. I can read caller ID, you know." I could see his smirk even though I couldn't actually see his face.

"I was just calling to ask when you were coming home." I said, a bit shyly. "Well, I was hoping it would be a quick trip, but turns out there's a lot of work to be done right now. I'm going to have to stay here for another week." Harry said.

"Another week? Were you going to tell me?" I asked. "Of course. I just got so busy and I hadn't gotten around to it. I'll be home as soon as possible. I promise. I have to get going though, we need to finalize some vocals. I love you." He said into the phone. I pushed back tears.

"I love you too." I whispered before hanging up the phone.

Hayley came back shortly after I hung up, without Niall. "What happened to Niall?" I asked, sipping the coffee I made myself. "I kicked him out. I could tell you needed girl time." Hayley said, coming over and wrapping me in a hug. I gladly accepted.

___________

When Harry finally came home, he seemed to be a little stressed. We had dinner when he could set aside some of his work for us to have a night together, and his phone wouldn't stop going off.

Then, he attempted to take me out to see a concert, but he had to cancel because he was being called into a last minute photoshoot for the album.

All of these incidents were making me realize the very sad truth, which was that I had been with Harry during a down time in his career. It was right after he finished his world tour, and while he was just hanging around and recording new music. It was arguably the most peaceful and relaxing time he had experience in a long time.

Now, things were in an upswing. He was busy. He had a lot of work to do and it was suddenly all in front of him, served on a golden platter with a side of overwhelming stress. I know for a fact I couldn't do it, but he could. It was his career, his life. It was what he loved and what he cherished.

The only problem was that I also wanted to be something he loved and something he cherished. So, tell me why it felt like he was having to push me to the side. Not willingly, but it was just a result of all the things he suddenly had to complete.

And I couldn't break up with him. I couldn't just say that I didn't want to be with him, but my unhappiness was starting to become overwhelming. I wouldn't be able to see him for days on end and when I could, it would be for only two hours, in between interviews and photo shoots.

He apologized countless times. He knew what was happening as well. I could see it in his eyes. He knew that things weren't working. But we loved each other. Hopelessly and endlessly. Every time I looked at him, I felt love, but I also felt pain.

Every time he looked at me, I'm sure he felt the same thing. And yet, here we were.

We were unsure of where to go, but we knew we needed to go there together. Being apart would hurt much more than being together. The pain would have to be worth it. For now, he was busy. For now, I was lonely.

But surely, that wouldn't last forever.

Would it?

__________________

I sincerely apologize. this took so long to put up and it's also much shorter.

i'm very sick, I got sick in California and ive been trying to rest since I got home. im glad I finally got around to publishing this. I hope it's good. it's kinda sad, but it's kinda good I think.

anyway, see you next update.

all my love,

haileexoxo