suddenly | minsung

eleven

maybe this was exactly what jisung needed right now. someone to sit with, someone to laugh with. and luckily for him jeongin was the perfect ball of sunshine for him. he just radiated this energy, even the smallest joke could make him laugh. 

and he knew this time not to fall in. friendship; that's all this was and he knew that. but that was all he was looking for anyways.

"anyways, i should get going," jisung stood up, checking the time on his phone.

"yeah that roommate of yours is probably looking for you," jeongin winked. "'mr edgy where the hell did you go?'" jeongin imitated minho's comment on jisung's recent instagram post.

"yeah right," jisung laughed and rolled his eyes. "he has a boyfriend," his smile faded as the words came out of his mouth, still slightly disappointed.

"oh, i'm sorry," jeongin frowned. "but hey, you walk home safe okay?" he gave jisung a pat on the shoulder. he was a good person. well rounded, kinda hearted, and considerate. jisung apprciated that about him. i mean, who else would be willing to sit with him in the cold night just talking?

"you too," jisung waved. and just like that the two of them walked in different directions. jisung kept his hands in his pockets and began his path back home. a part of him didn't want to walk back in. minho and kangmin's annoying lovey dovey phone calls are only going to remind him how lonely jisung is.

yet still, he continued walking home because shit, a winter night alone in the streets? not exactly ideal.

______________________________________

jisung unlocked the door, trying to open it as quietly as he could. sure in his mind things were slightly awkward and he was slightly upset with minho, but he wasn't rude and he definitely didn't want to wake the older boy.

little did jisung know he was already there, waiting for him at the bar countertop, slowly falling asleep in his palms.

"m-minho?" jisung called, closing the door behind him.

"jisung!" minho jolted up. "jisung you little bitch where the hell did you go?"

jisung stared at the boy. he had been waiting? but why? he also smiled to himself. how minho could look so well with tired eyes and messy hair, jisung could never tell.

but jisung snapped out of it. "why do you care?"

minho stood from the barstool he was previously seated at. "because, sungie," minho began, slightly stumbling onto his feet. "you always tell me when you're going somewhere. i was worried,"

"worried?" jisung cocked his head to the side. "can't i hang out with a friend and make my own choices? why the hell were you of all people worried?" jisung didn't mean to snap, he really didn't. but all of his emotions came out at this moment and at this point he really just couldn't help it.

"what?" minho stood there in shock. 

"god," jisung sighed, throwing his coat onto the floor, speed walking to his room as he did. "i-i'm sorry, i just-" tears filled jisung's eyes. what the hell was that? why did i do that?

minho watched as jisung slammed his door, hearing the sound of the boy slumping against the back of it. he contemplated knocking on the door and talking to the boy. 

but he decided to give him time to rest. who knows what happened to him while he was out. he could've lost someone for all he knew.

but that was all he knew. he didn't know it was him jisung had lost.

but minho just sat in his room, listening to the sad, muffled sobs. he really wondered what happened. it all seemed to go downhill within seconds.

on the other side of the hall, jisung called a friend. a new friend, but someone he trusted. the only person he felt comfortable telling.

jeongin.

he told him the entire story in sobs, jeongin on the other end silently listening to the boy cry.

"it's unfair! he can't just-" jisung sniffed. "he can't just push me away and begin worrying about me like that. it's messing with me..."

jeongin felt a pang of sympathy for the older boy. he just got to know him, but he couldn't help but feel for jisung.

"no one loves me, i'm unwanted.." jisung told himself.

"no, jisung! stop that right now! you-" jeongin stood from his bed, putting so much emphasis on his words. he's never felt more serious than in that moment.

"god i'm sorry, you're probably exhausted," jisung huffed out a breath of air and smiled, slightly laughing at himself between cries. "we just met and i just-" 

"no! you're fine, i'm fine," jeongin assured. "it's you who should get some rest, jisung,"

jisung nodded in response, even though he knew jeongin couldn't see him.

"you're just overwhelemed. you've been through so much," 

jisung cried into the phone. "yeah, thanks jeongin. sorry for bothering,"

"no worries, call me anytime if you need anything, okay?"

"alright," jisung nodded again. he put down his phone and ended the call.

and here's to another night flopping onto his bed crying, but this time maybe from his own actions.