Pain and Silent...or speak?

Truth be Told

I turned 15. Just a year later. During that time I had been sent to live with my dad's father and his new wife. (I didn't like her very much). When me and my brothers came back half way through the school year, we all reunited. We were sent away so that my parents could fix some money issues, and other things that were personal. We moved to a small little city. Willi. It's not the best place but it's been great here, and I had started tharapy when depression showed. She was a pretty cool person, I went to a place called CHR. It wasn't all bad but I trusted her enough to tell her about what happened to me when I was younger, she decided to call DCF after I told her it wouldn't be nessesary. Next thing I knew they were knocking on our doorstep, same lady we worked with years ago with a clipboard and paper in her hands. We went through many conversations before I agreed to take it to court, they put me in a small gray room with a different lady in it and a stand with the big papers on it. A stick to my right and in front of me a small black round table. I sat down across from her and she went through everything that was gonna happen. First they had a recording camera and a mic on her so they could hear and see me. Next they wanted me to explain everything as detailed as I could using words I felt comfortable saying. When I started she wanted me to show her how I was placed on the counter and that made me uncomfortable. For one. I'd rather not. And two why do they need that information anyway? But I did as they asked and got it over with as fast as I could. They used the recording as my voice so I won't have to speak at court very much and use it as evidence. I was extremely disappointed when my DCF worker told me Kyle had fled to California with his new girlfriend who had gotten a job there. I felt hurt because it wasn't my parents who told me, and later on I found out once again I've been fucked over. She told me they couldn't continue pressing charges to him and they had to drop it all. My family also didn't tell me that, and for weeks I'd been thinking I could finally have him get the punishment he deserved, I'd wonder for hours a day thinking when they would catch him and bring him in. For once in my life I wished to see him return so I could look at him behind bars and tell him one thing.
"I was once a caged bird, trapped and feeling alone. Now I'm free and you are the one who's been caged." 
I wanted to tell him that I knew what happened to people in jail who has raped others, people in there will punish the person by raping them. I wanted to tell him that I hoped people found out what he did to me and he gets the same treatment. But I couldn't. And in fact I also wanted to tell him 'thank you'. Why you might ask? Because with out the help of my familys support and the friends I had around me with their encouragement I was able to channel my hate for Kyle and stand up. I was finally able to speak. My story was out. I broke hard when they dropped everything that I worked so hard for to get!! I felt betrayed, hurt, once again I felt alone and that my feelings, my past, my words were nothing. I couldn't do anything. I felt like I had years ago when I was conflicted. Silence or speak.