Thanks to @TheTigerWriter for the amazing cover
"You disgust me", I said.
"The feeling is mutual", she retorted.
"If so why didn't you stop it? You are so desperate", I spat unable to control my anger.
"I could ask you the same. Don't flatter yourse...
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Anand Priya... I still can't believe what Isha said. I know that it seems wrong to walk out on Isha while she was talking. I'm pretty sure she understands that I need time. It's a lot to process what she said. Priya is no more? I still can't believe. I understand why they say 'heartbreak' and feel so sad. It is very painful, almost as if someone is twisting your heart. "Anand. ANAND. Snap out of it. Come I'll take you home", Dinesh said. Seems like I was in my own world to not hear Dinesh approaching me. I know he didn't mean to be harsh and that he doesn't wish me to overthink. But I found it unfair that he says me to snap out of it. It's quite a shock to know that the one you wished and dreamt of sharing your life with is no more. The only one I can now confide in right now is my brother, Achyut. Though he seems goofy, he always what to say. Also, he's the one who knows how long I've dreamt about sharing my life with Priya, so he'd understand. I know it's all my hopeful thinking that someone can understand me right now. No one can understand how it feels to have your world that you have spent most of your life imagining being cruelly shattered because of the truth you were unaware of till that point unless they have been in that situation. "I understand why people say we should always do what we desire so that we won't have to regret it in the future. I wish I had told Priya how I felt. I know that it is selfish of me to think like this. I am aware that all this is wishful thinking and there's nothing I could have done. But you know right Dinesh? The heart wants what it wants," I say very much aware that my voice is quivering. "Anand, I wouldn't pretend and say I can understand how you feel and that it's all going to be okay. I just want you to remember that I will always be there for you. But you also have to understand how your parents would feel if you remain like this and never want to marry. I know you long enough to understand your thought process. So please at least give it a try. Promise me you wouldn't shun marriage because you lost Priya. Knowing you for long I can say you are very vulnerable right now. So don't make rash decisions. Please keep in mind the effects it would have on your family. I know that you are aware of all this but when one is in a heart-wrenching situation like this, it is very easy to stray from rational thinking.," Dinesh said before I was about to leave. I promised him though I was not sure if I am capable of keeping my word. I will try. I will try not to be miserable so that none of my family or friends would be sad. That doesn't mean this is going to hurt any less. All these thoughts were running in my brain on the journey home. I wasn't even aware when I reached my home after getting down from Dinesh's car. It almost seemed that everything I am doing is mechanical without much thought. Once I entered my home, my mood was lifted seeing the most crucial part of my life, my nephew, Piyush. It's true when people say that in our life, the problems never lessen but we become strong enough to face them. The only one who could cheer my mood would be Piyush. Kids are the purest form of happiness blessed to us. I will draw the strength from the happiness of my loved ones. I will become better not for me but so as to not burden them. So I dropped the bomb. "Maa, I know that you are trying to get me married. I have known for quite some time now. Today I've made up my mind. I will marry anyone you choose. I will leave that responsibility to you guys", I said trying not to let anyone else know the emotions I'm really feeling. The only way I can think of is not to be overly emotional. To say my family was happy would be an understatement. Maybe this is all for the best. Hopefully, I would also slowly be happy. One thing is for sure, whatever may happen I will try my best not to let them know the complete story. It is sufficient that I am suffering, no need to hurt everyone. Nothing good would come from it. I had no idea what life had in store for me. The only thing I can do right now is to only hope that my marriage wouldn't cause any unnecessary drama in the house.
