Same But Different - GirlxGirl (Completed)

Chapter Thirty Six

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The rest of the night was awkward. Belle packed her bags and told Mrs. Williams that she’ll be staying with her brother for a while. I didn’t want to go behind her and console her this time. I just wanted this night to be over. The whole day had passed and Yuri hasn’t shown up yet. I wondered if she’ll ever come out from her shell, I wondered if she was waiting for me to pull her out.

I sat on my bed, thinking about my life. Our Life.

I set the camera and pressed record. I wanted Yuri to know what I felt; I wanted things to be back to normal.

“Yuri, I know things have been getting tough lately. I just want you to know that I’m here for you. And I forgive you for pretending to be Riley because I am done fighting with you, I’m done finding love, I don’t wish to seek it either. Truth is, only one of us gets to have a life here and the other one has to suck it up. This is me sucking it up and surrendering. I’ll help you and in return you have to help me by starting to forget about me. I’m here as your alter, I am not you but I am still you. It’ll never make sense so stop trying to fix something that’s unfixable. You’ll find love one day, I promise. Everyone will remember and respect you and I’ll help you get there. Don’t throw your life away for me. And don’t cry it doesn’t suit you at all. Okay?”

I sniffed as I switched the camera off. Unknowingly I was hurting two of the most important people in my life. And I cannot do anything to help them. I was as helpless as them.

*BLANK*

The sound of the school bell woke Yuri up from her thoughts. She had watched Sasha’s video update, and her words rang in Yuri’s ears over and over again.

“Stop trying to fix something that’s unfixable”

How could she not? What’s so wrong in having a little faith?

Since when did someone like Sasha give up so easily?

“This is me sucking it up and surrendering”

Yuri never asked her to do such a thing. Even though Sasha had come into Yuri’s life with no permission, Yuri wasn’t going to be the boss of her. To her they were equal, they were different and there’s no way she’d let Sasha surrender to her like a slave.

“I’m done finding love, I don’t wish to seek it anymore”

“Not even from me?” Yuri thought sadly. Had she lost a battle that never even had a chance to begin?

“Hey you” Jason stopped in front of Yuri.

“Hey” was all she replied.

“Look I know you’re going to hate me for asking but here goes. Are you Yuri or Sasha?”

Yuri kicked his leg hard. Jason was her best friend, although this was still new to him, he should be able to tell them apart. He should!

“Holyshit fuck Oww that hurt! Yuri?”

“My best friend can’t tell me apart, what has my life come to?” Yuri complained throwing her books into her locker.

“Sasha lets her hair down like you now, and excuse me if I can’t tell you both apart. Whenever you’re in a bad mood, you look like Sasha”

“Don’t you talk bad about her” Yuri pinched him this time.

“Owww, Yuri!”

“Okay, sorry. I am in a bad mood” Yuri confessed feeling bad.

“What happened?”

“Sasha told me to stop obsessing over her” Her voice trailed off. Even saying it out loud makes her even sadder.

“Okay so stop obsessing over her” Jason replied simply. Like as if it was that easy.

Do you think it’s easy, because it’s not” Yuri blurts out what was in her mind.

“It’ll get easier, trust me” Jason says as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. He smiles at a text. That smile. Yuri has seen that smile before, back when they were dating.

“Who are you texting?” Yuri asked curiously.

“Ah it’s no one. Just some girl” Jason replied still smiling.

“Your face says otherwise. Tell me who is it?”

“Okay, alright. Her name is Vicky Styles, she’s my partner in the Biology Project” Jason starched the back of his neck as he spoke. He was blushing, Yuri noticed.

“Styles? Is she Harry Styles’ sister?”

“No, I don’t think she has a brother. And who the hell is Harry Styles?”

“You don’t know who he is?” Yuri lifted her eyebrows at a very clueless Jason but then decided not to go all One Direction on him.

“You like her, don’t you?” Yuri pinched Jason out of excitement. Who said ex-girlfriends can’t be cool?

This made Jason jump. “Owww, yes Yuri. Could you stop abusing me now?”

Things were slowly turning around. Jason was happily moving on. And it made Yuri feel nothing else but happy. Only if things with Sasha could sort out, then it would be perfect. Yuri thought. She was blindly falling in love and that was perfectly okay. Yuri knew all the obstacles, she knew it was impossible.

But if Sasha made her happy, does it really matter?

Does it matter what others think of her?

Was she living her life to please others? Its true, life hadn’t been fair to her for a while now. She thought her life had been cursed the day she knew there was an alter living inside her body. But that curse has now become her best blessing. She was glad to have Sasha in her life. Moreover she was glad she was falling in love with someone like Sasha. So there was no way in hell, she’d back down.

Not now, not ever.

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Yuri sat in front of the camera and let out a breath slowly.

“You don’t need to surrender, Sasha. We both can have the life we want. No one has to suck it up. I’m reaching out to you and all you have to do it hold my hand, and the rest, will just work itself out. This is the generation we live in, where people are homosexual, bi sexual, even transsexual. True, we’d be nothing like them, because we’re different. But is that so bad? Is it bad being different? Let other people judge. Are we living for them? This is what I want, you are what I want. And although you keep saying you’re going to be by my side, I need you to stop being my protective alter because it’s not a job. You have your separate life Sasha. Live a little, love a little because when you don’t seek love, love will eventually find you. And If I’m so wrong, tell me you don’t feel the same way even a bit and I’ll drop it. Because all I know is Riley did change your mind, and you did spring feelings for her. Riley is me, everything she said and did was all me, only difference is the change in our names. Don’t tell me I’m crazy or to think logic, because as far as I know, two people living inside one body is far from logic too. But If I’m really crazy, then I suggest you be crazy with me”

Authors Note

I was listening to ‘Clarity’- Foxx feat Zedd and ‘You wouldn’t like me’ by Tegan and Sarah while writing this chapter and I must say how well both of the songs matched this chapter! A lot will happen after this, so stay tuned! :D