His Weapon - Book 1 [Z.M]

XXVII

Again, he wasn't pleased with me making us walk. He insisted we take his car but I didn't want it that way. I didn't want him to be the rich and powerful Zayn— I didn't want any of his luxurious life being part of our night. I wanted it to just be him and I— plain me.
The Uber driver was waiting for us at the entrance of the gated estate because he couldn't be allowed in at such a time. Zayn kept complaining. However, there was still a thick cloud over us, a weight on my shoulder.
The ride was silent with both of us staring out of our respective windows. The destination had already been given to the driver through the app so there were no questions and Zayn was still clueless as to where I was taking him.
He wasn't complaining anymore, I could tell he was in deep thoughts and so was I.
We were almost there and I felt a bile rise in my throat. My blood began to boil and drain from my face. I was scared and nervous at the same time. Almost as though he sensed my worry, he reached out and touched my knee, giving it a light squeeze. I smiled. I couldn't have done it with anyone else.

There it was. My favorite childhood restaurant, the one Caren, Cameron and I would bitch about all the time until our parents brought us to. One of the places I can't feel like I belong without them.
Zayn's eyes were on me— I could feel it but I didn't look. All I did was stare at the restaurant as we got closer and closer. The Uber driver parked in front of the entrance and ended the trip. I began to dread every moment.
Zayn reached for his wallet to pay but I had beaten him to it and paid. His glare was hard but didn't say anything although I could tell he was itching to. I reached for his hands and slowly lead him in.
"Are you okay?"
He asked and I nodded, unable to answer. I took in a deep breath and lead him to a seat. After six long years, nothing had changed from the last time I was here but the faces weren't familiar. I slid in next to Zayn and squeezed his thigh.
"What do you think?"
I asked and he looked around with pursed lips. I rolled my eyes.
"I like it actually."
He said, smiling down at me and that broadened my smile. I leaned in and kissed him— a quick kiss.
"I used to come here with my parents and siblings all the time."
I told him, glancing around.
"You grew up here?"
He asked and I turned to look at him.
"Yes, not really far from here."
I smiled although I didn't have any reason to as I thought about this place but I was there with him and that alone had me smiling.

The waitress came over to our table, practically eye fucking Zayn but it didn't bother me. He's very good looking and I can't stop women from looking. He was totally oblivious to it though, he always is.
I on the other hand was anxious to order my veggie-packed Buddha bowl. It has always been my favorite even though I hated vegetables. I talked Zayn into getting the broccoli chicken Alfredo lasagna because I wanted to eat some as well.
I wasn't trying to be anyone around him this time. I was myself— laughing and goofing around and so was he. We weren't talking about anything serious, just taking a piss out of each other.

Our meals came in shortly but I didn't have much of an appetite either. I was still worried for some reason.
"You seemed sooo excited about the food but you're barely eating."
Zayn stated but he was barely eating either.
"I feel awkward around you."
I said honestly and he dropped his fork, frowning at me.
"You don't have to."
He replied, knowing fully well what I was talking about.
"But it's soo hard not to, I mean I'm trying but I don't know. I don't want you seeing me in that kind of light."
I was being vocal about my worries. As much as I wanted to bottle it in, I wanted to talk about it.
"What kind of light?"
He asked but I knew he knew what I meant. I exhaled frustratedly.
"You know what I mean."
I tried not to show it but I found myself feeling like shit either way. I've always wondered how daddy felt about it from where he was— he couldn't come out and smack me but I imagined him crying and being disappointed. Dad was very emotional.
"Ugh now I really regret it."
He ran his fingers over his face— matching my frustration.
"I'm sorry, I hate the fact that you're feeling like this. It doesn't matter who you were, I don't care."
He said.

"You can't tell me you just found out I was a prostitute just a few hours ago and you're totally fine with it. That's not possible."
I said in disbelief. I wanted him to admit it was going to be a problem and that it might or might not pop into his head every time he touches me.
"I'm not fine with it. I hate the fact that other men put their hands on you and took advantage of y—"
"—No one took advantage of me. I knew what I was getting myself into."
I said, hating the fact that he was going around in circles. It had nothing to do with anyone apart from me and I wanted him to understand that and still want me for me.
"—Because you had to."
He said simply, daring me with his eyes to say otherwise.
"Doesn't change anything, does it? The rest aren't so different, they all have to, we all had to."
I asked and diverted my gaze to my food. We ate in silence and kept stealing glances at each other.
"I always preferred eating under the table, it pissed the shit out of my Mum."
I said randomly and he smiled. I admit— I was a pretty strange kid. Even I don't understand my younger self anymore.
"I can imagine little Muna being a pain in the ass, even grown up Muna is."
He joked
"Oh shut up, you want me either way."
I pouted and he laughed.
  "You can't get enough of me," I added and he actually rolled his eyes.
"—Neither can you."
He shot back and I chuckled. This man fucks my mind sooo bad.
"You're right, if it were up to me, we'd never leave the sheets."
I said coyly and his jaw literally dropped.
"I had no idea you were this naughty."
He faked disbelief— pointing his fork at me and I chuckled. There's a lot he doesn't know about me.
"There's a lot you don't know."
I smiled and he smiled back. However, I wasn't joking. If I could have my way, we'd never leave the sheets.

We continued to bicker back and forth with each other. The awkwardness was long gone now and I was beginning to feel like myself again. It was still shocking that he doesn't mind my past. What was more shocking was the fact that my infidelity with Nicholas bothered him more than my past.
I was almost happy that our day turned out this way. It made me believe he might actually like me even if he doesn't want to admit it. I mean he pussyfoots about it but nothing could ever beat him straight out saying it.
I kept taking food from his plate but he didn't mind. He wasn't being stuck up, he even reached out a couple of times to eat off my plate as well. I saw him actually laugh more than I've seen him frown and I couldn't have been happier. The more time we spent fooling around the more I noticed just how much he and Nicholas had in common. Zayn isn't boring and up-tight as he makes everyone believe. He's actually crazy and says stupid stuff.

"What?"
He asked with food in his mouth like he hadn't just said the most unlike Zayn thing to say, not to mention he was sitting as though he was in his private sitting room, facing me even though I was sat next to him.
"Okay who the fuck are you? Where have you taken my Zayn?"
I asked, squinting at him and he laughed.
"Did you just call me your Zayn?"
He grinned like a teenage boy and I suddenly felt shy for some reason. There were soo many butterflies in my stomach. It felt like an actual date and I was soo glad I decided to bring him out.
"You're mine for as long as you want to be."
I rolled my eyes and he scrunched up his nose with a smile. His smile faded quickly though and was replaced with a straight face.
"—And you're mine as well Muna, completely mine. I don't like to share."
He held my gaze the entire time and I bit my upper lip— knowing exactly what he was referring to.
"I don't like to share as well," I replied and his eyes darkened.
"You don't have to worry about that."
He licked his bottom lip and I almost flung myself on him but I had to keep in mind that we were in public. I buried my face in my palm. I was blushing soo hard even though he wouldn't be able to tell. I felt like a teenager all over again.
"Are you saying if a girl walked by with a big ass and a full chest, I still wouldn't have to worry?"
I asked, demonstrating the sizes and he laughed.
"I'm saying I only want you."
He said simply and I couldn't help it, I buried my face in my palm again and I heard him chuckle.
"—You're being so fucking cute right now."

✯

Please vote • comment • share

•Princess T•