VERDICT OF LOVE

Chapter 22

"What ?" she asks curiously searching for any emotion in my eyes but I stare at her blankly.

"Was it easy when you left me hanging?"

Her face holds confusion while her eyes say a different thing " I don't understand your question"

"Why are you doing this? How could you even consider this as an option" I say waving the file in the air " I will never give my baby up for adoption no matter how convincing you become" I say firmly.

I fling the file across the room in resentment " Shiloh I know what you are feeling right now but all this is for your good..." She says softly trying to take my hands in hers but I pull my hand away.

I glare at her cutting her short" no you don't understand anything, not when you left me alone when I needed you and now here you are telling me to give my baby away" I say through gritted teeth.

She looked at me dejected" please Shiloh just listen to me" she says pleading.

I would like to listen to what she has to say but I am done listening for once, she needs to listen " Come to think of it " I say thoughtfully " you are all scared because this may get to the public so you only trying to get rid of my baby because of your family selfish reasons " I say spitefully my glare still in place.

The words coming from my mouth felt so foreign, I would never sound like this no matter how angry I get but maybe it happens when you are being pushed off your limits.

I felt a sting on my cheek snapping me out of my thought making tears roll down from my cheeks.

I hiss from the impact blinking to clear the cloud of tears blocking my eyes trying to focus on my surroundings.

Finally focusing on my surrounding I find Sylvia staring at her hands like it was the most bizarre thing ever, looking stunned.

I place my hand on my cheek feeling the red imprint of her hand on my cheek.

Sylvia would never raise her hand on me but I guess things changed" Shiloh I am so sorry.." I put my hand between us stopping her apology.

I wipe away the tears "it's okay" I say calmly feeling weary suddenly.

"Mum and dad care about you but things are so complicated and there are things we can't tell you right now," she says furtively.

I shake my head in a no motion " I won't beg for your time and attention anymore. The more you ignore me, the more I will get used to being ignored. "I say meeting her sad gaze on me " if you stop calling me, I will stop waiting for your calls. If you stop sending me text messages, I will get rid of my habit of checking my phone all day" she tries cutting me off but I refuse to let her speak because I just need to get all this desperation off my chest.

But why does it feel like I am breaking my own heart?.

"The more you stay away from me, the more I will adapt to staying away from you," I say not only directing these words to her but to everyone who hurt me.

She runs her hand over her face looking sad and helpless, Sylvia I know always looks collected with a bright smile on her face but right now she looks nothing like that.