Posted Five Minutes Ago [TreeBros/Cevan]

~Apologies~

Connor's POV

Sorry.

Had I upset him? I suppose my reaction was uncalled for. He's wary, and I get it, I could be anyone. Regret fills my stomach and I wished that I could recall the email and modify it to sound less aggressive. 

I layed back on my bed, bits of hair covering my face and the light hanging from my roof shining in my eyes. I still felt some sort of hope as a result of him replying to me, as if he was delaying what I was fearing he'd do. There was still time. 

I can't remember exactly how I found his blog. Perhaps I was struggling and was searching for a sign that someone out there was going through something similar and it popped up, or maybe it was the complete lack of any design on the blog itself that peaked my interest one day. There was just a solid background colour with 'Evan's Blog' in a standard black font, followed by posts dating back to January filled with the rawest feelings of some random person. I would often go back to his blog to read what he'd written- especially if I was having a rough time- and I'd feel less alone. I didn't want to interact for a long time in case this was a strange bot, and by doing so I'd get direct messages asking me to follow links. I didn't want to spoil it. Even if it was a bot, it felt real.

But following my recent email, I'm convinced this is a real person. A real person who I might've hurt through my last message.

~

I wandered through the school gates, phone in hand, hair masking the majority of my face and my uniform untucked and untidy.  I didn't get why the teachers made such a big deal about my uniform. Who cares if my socks are the wrong shade of black? Or if my sleeves are rolled up? They give less than half of their energy to 'help' me when I told them I was struggling a bit in year 7, but the second they notice that some part of my uniform doesn't match their dress code they're suddenly bothered and ready to give me a thrashing. 

Right on queue, a hand sharply touches my shoulder and I remove my attention from typing out an email towards the wrinkled, grumpy face of a senior member of staff. 

"Nail polish," she says bluntly. "You know the rules on nail polish, Mr Murphy." I had forgotten that my hands were visible while on my phone. Ordinarily, I'd stuff them into my pockets as I'd walk passed the staff that lined the gates and I might be lucky enough to make it through the day without removing it. Today was not one of those days. Rolling my eyes, I began heading to the student office as instructed to get it removed. I finished my email on the journey, hitting send before I had chance to change my mind. 

Goodmorning Evan,

I'm sorry for the delay with this email. I didn't mean to sound so snappy in the last one I sent. I had no right to go off like that. 

In hopes of dismissing your worries, I haven't appeared in your inbox in hopes to do something malicious. I just want to help you feel less alone, in the way your blog has helped me in the past. I'm a teenager from a small town, who found your blog by accident and who found comfort in reading your posts. 

I'm sorry again.

Sincerely, Connor.

I let out a deep sigh, putting my phone away as I approached the desk and asked for some nail polish remover. The man glared as he inspected me, clearly making a judgement, before eventually turning to get the bottle. I take a seat and sprinkle some of the liquid on some cotton wool before scrubbing, cringing slightly at the terrible sound and sensation of the cotton against my nail.

"Can I have a tie, please?" A rushed voice asked at the desk, his fingers tapping impatiently  as he waited. I stood up to return the bottle, glancing down at the student infront of me as I waited beside him, recognising him as a kid from my English class. 

"You had better return this one, Evan," The man said, handing over the striped clip-on tie. "This is the third this week, and I've only had one back from you. These are loans, not gifts." 

"Sorry," he replied sheepishly. "I've just forgotten them. I'll bring them on Monday." The man raised his eyebrows,  and took the bottle from me before turning around. I started walking towards class, lowkey hoping this Evan would overtake me and go into the class before hand so the eyes of the other students would be more focused on him. It wasn't a major deal if I had to walk in first, I would just prefer not to. 

~

An hour into the triple English session, I felt my phone buzz against my leg and without a second thought, I removed it from my pocket and opened my emails. 

Connor,

It's a little crazy to me that there's someone who finds comfort in my blog. A little heartwarming too, in a way. Thanks again for your concern too, Connor. 

How's your day going?

Sincerely, Evan.

I felt a wave of relief at the fact he got back to me, and so soon too. He also seems to be making an effort to keep a conversation going which was promising. I hoped he was reconsidering.