Running Away from the Billionaire (LOB series #4)

Chapter 26

"Are you still just toying around? We're not kids anymore Kaye! We have a daughter for fuck's sake!" Tears started streaming from me eyes and I can't stop them. "Every time... every time that I'm starting to think that maybe... maybe you... you—" He stopped. He angrily wiped his face with his hands before he let out an exasperated sigh. "Shouldn't I be the one who's crying?"

Gusto kong magsalita. Gusto kong sabihin kung gaano ko siya ka-mahal pero walang ibang lumalabas na boses mula sa bibig ko kundi ang mga hikbi.

I want to marry him. God knows how much I love the idea of him with me and our daughter being a family. A complete and a blessed one. It's just that... he's marrying me for the wrong reason.

Ayaw kong pakasalan niya ako nang dahil may anak kami. I want him to marry me because he loves me, not because we need to give our child a complete family.

Marriage that are built for that reason end up breaking each other and I don't want to put Riona through a situation where she spent her childhood crying and depressed because her parents are having an annulment.

I want him to marry me without any baggage.

The baggage of his own anger towards me who kept his daughter from him for years dahil baka sa huli—ayoko mang isipin—pero baka sa huli... pagsisihan niya na ako ang pinakasalan niya at kapag nangyari iyon baka hindi ko kayanin.

"I'm tired. Just... do whatever you want." Was the last thing he said before he went out of the room and closed the door.

The next day he took Riona out. Naiwan akong mag isa sa unit kahit wala naman akong trabaho. I couldn't volunteer to go with them dahil sino ba naman ako para agawan pa ng oras na makilala nila ang isa't isa? I put them into too much pain already and it's just not right to steal Klaus' moment with our daughter.

Dalawang buwan na ang lumipas pero wala pa kaming matinong pag-uusap ni Klaus kundi tungkol lang kay Riona. He would ask me something about her and I would answer it directly—mostly through text, at kapag tumatawag naman siya sinasabi niya lang kapag nasa baba na siya at hinatid si Riona sa akin.

From: Babe
I'll pick Riona tomorrow at 9am

I read as Riona and I rode the elevator to get to my unit. Should I change his name on my phone? I started to click on the contacts and edit his name but ended up not doing it. Pakiramdam ko kapag ginawa ko iyon, tuluyan ko nang tinanggap na nawala na sa akin si Klaus. I refused to believe it. I sighed. I scrolled through our last conversation and all of it was civil, na parang hindi niya ako minahal.

Na parang hindi niya na ako mahal.

Ni hindi ko siya matignan sa mata kaya tuwing sinusundo niya si Riona, palagi lang akong nakayuko at nakatingin sa anak namin dahil sa bawat tingin ko sa kanya, parang may tumutusok sa puso ko.

I can't accept the way Klaus looks at me now. Those loving eyes that used to stare at me for years has gone and turned into something cold.

Sa bawat tingin na ibinibigay niya sa akin, hindi ko matanggap na si Klaus siya. Na siya ang taong minahal ako ng ilang taon at mahal na mahal ko ngayon, but what can I do? I forced him to be like that. It's entirely my fault.

"Next week's your birthday mommy ko!" Riona said excitedly as we enter the room. "Let's celebrate with daddy!"

"I don't know anak, your daddy might be busy on that day." I don't want to give her false hopes. She shook her head as I crouched down to help her remove her clothes.

"No mommy, daddy can cancel his meeting. He did it for me once." She raised one finger while grinning to show me. Napangiti ako.

I know how Klaus can be to someone he loves. He always keep them on top of his priority lists.

Pero hindi ikaw.

He may have loved me but he never kept me on his priority list. Hindi noon at lalong hindi ngayon.

I gave my daughter a smile when she cocked her head at one side while looking at me. She cupped my face.

"Why are you sad mommy?" Nanlambot ang puso ko nang makita ang mukha ng anak ko. She looks like Klaus.

I suddenly hugged her and sobbed silently. Riona didn't say anything and just let me hug her. I miss him.

I miss Klaus.