call me again → cmbyn ✔

6- hurting me

oliver ✰° ✧ ⁎ ·˙․

we arrived back to the house fairly quickly. the ride was almost completely silent, except for the odd question samuel (mr perlman) would ask me. i put my hand on elios leg to try and get his attention and he flinched, cowering away like i'd hurt him, as he had the first time i touched his shoulder. i'm going to fix this ache i've caused him, i just wish i could do it sooner.

"so oliver, you're going to be staying in elios room again" samuel looked at me through the rear view mirror. i looked over to elio who was still cowering toward the door, as far from me as possible. his arm leaning on the car door and his head resting in his hand.

i opened my door first, elio and his father followed behind. i had packed for winter but wished that it would be hot as it was before. i walked straight to where elios room was and placed my bag on the bed. i sighed deeply, looking around. i had so many memories of this room, engraved in my mind and constantly in my dreams.

i trailed my hand round the bed frame, looking also out the window at the dew on the grass. i felt so cold, but it wasn't the weather. i sighed yet again and made my way down the stairs to greet elios mother, i grinned at her as she came into view.

"oliver" i heard her accent and smiled, she was like the accepting mother i never had. the thing i'm the most surprised about is the fact i'm not being treated any differently, apart from elio obviously.

"hello mrs perlman" i grinned and hugged her, she quickly returned my hug.

"oh why so formal, you're part of the family" she smiled and pinched my cheek.

"sorry, annella" i corrected myself, she kissed both my cheeks and said something in italian i couldn't understand. you'd think i would've learnt a little since last time, but i'm still pretty useless.

i felt myself getting a little drowsy, annella excused herself and went back to cooking, i headed upstairs to bed. as i opened the door, i saw a full head of brown curly hair leave through the door adjoining our rooms. i grimaced, just missed him.

i jumped into bed, allowing sleep to engulf me. silently praying for something better than this nightmare.

elio ✰° ✧ ⁎ ·˙․

at first i entered cautiously, the dinner bell had just rung so i thought i'd get oliver. i walked into the room and noticed him sleeping and decided against waking him up. but i stood still momentarily. i remembered waking him up his first day by dropping a book, strange but effective.

my mind which had been none stop running in circles for the past few months, came to a sudden halt. i looked at the man who owned my heart, and wondered how i let him slip away. he was beautiful, just as he was when he left. i was at a loss for words.

then his eyes fluttered open, "elio?" he said, more of a statement than a question, like he was expecting me to be standing here.

"dinners ready" i told him, trying not to make eye contact.

"tell your mom i'm not going, yeah?" he said and closed his eyes again, i felt the tears prick in my eyes. ugh why am i so sensitive.

"no oliver! i'm not a little slave you can order around!" i got choked up as i ran a hand through my hair, what i was doing was dramatic and i knew that, but it was also honest because this is how i'd felt the last few months. i'd felt so cooped up in my own body; because half of me was missing.

"woah elio, calm down i'm sorry" he sat up, extending a hand to me. i walked towards him and he clutched the side of my arm. his grip felt like a hot iron, and apparently i was ice, because a few seconds later i was at his side, in his arms sobbing. these were the sobs i'd been keeping in since the phone call.

"don't marry her" it came out before i could stop it, i'd been thinking it since i'd been told about the engagement. i just never thought i'd say it to oliver himself.

oliver's grip tightened around when i spoke. "i have to elio" he whispered in my ear. i felt myself let out another sob and oliver tensed around me again, pulling me closer.

"i have to, because my mother believes that it's wrong for people like us to be together" he sighed and rubbed my back, like he used to. this reminded me of when we were in the attic, the oh-so-familiar fruit i was now too scared to eat. he'd scarred me for life with that little peach game.

"but oliver why does it matter?" i pulled away and looked him in the eye, there were still tears rolling down my cheeks as i cried into the man i was tied to.

"because, my parents approval matters; and i love her elio" i wanted to yell at him to stop calling me elio. i wanted him to call me oliver, i wanted to sleep with him again, i just wanted to be with him until he leaves me again and goes back to his fiancé who i know he doesn't love.

"and you didn't love me?" i whispered with, a sob following shortly after. oliver's hands found my cheeks and wiped away the tears that were falling.

"that's a silly question elio, you know i loved you, you know that" he sighed and ran a hand through his hair. i got up, before he could say something else that would ruin everything.

"do i?" i said as i slammed the door and walked back to my room. i sat on my bed shoved my head into the pillow, which helped muffle the sobs that followed it. now not only was i sad, but i was sad and hungry.

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hey!!

i just wanted to update even tho it's 1:47am for me right now! love english times aha

i had a love fest about timmy today, and also i didn't know armie was in gossip girl!! and now i may have to watch the whole series again.

anyway! don't forget to vote as it shows me that you guys want more! ❤️

[editing sarah]
if anyone has any feedback send it my way because i'm currently editing :)
word count: 1102