self therapy

my school life pt.2

it was my first day of school (technically the second day), in a new school. it was a fresh start, no one knows me, maybe I could make some new friends.

"no one would want to be your real friend. they'll only use you again"

I was really nervous going into the classroom and sat down in the only available desk. the guy who sat next to me, Gabe, helped me out during the day, he was nice to me and we actually had a lot in common like Minecraft and sports. I have the habit to become friends with the person who sits next to me, so we eventually became good friend. I didn't really talk to anyone else, only to trash talk during games or to make a sarcastic comment every now and then. which wasn't how I wanted to talk with people most of the time, but that's just part of the mask I wear I guess. everyone was actually nice to me, they never really started conversations and I didn't start them either, but either way people were really nice. that year I developed my first drawing style, it wasn't good now that I look back into it but at the time it made me really happy.

I would always be drawing instead of talking with the other kids, and if I wasnt I was working on school work and for some weird reason I was called the smart kid. I didn't really belived that, I knew I was stupid, the only reason I knew this stuff was because I had repeated and seen it before already. but I smiled at the complement anyway. school life was getting a lot better and I was genially happy. around 3 months later, Gabe was moved to the other side of the class and replace with a girl. I was upset that now I had less time to talk with Gabe. (and don't get me wrong I saw him as a brother) now my new desk buddy was a shy, quiet girl who didn't really make any attempt to talk to me and I didn't either so the first couple of days were really awkward and quiet. than one day we had free time so I was drawing in my sketchbook (it was a notebook, at the time I couldn't afford a blank page sketchbook) since we had some free time from school work, the girl, Gaby pulled on my shirt sleeve to get my attention and asked to use my eraser. I told her that it was fine and she used it and retuned it when she was done.

I looked over and saw her drawing some anime character, and I thought that I might as well try to start a conversation to end the awkward silence. I asked her who she was drawing and she shyly answered "his name is Naruto" I realized that i've seen Naruto before, so we started talking about it more and she showed me more drawings over the week. and we became good friends and talked a lot more. (which is a really weird and stupid way to become friends but we're not normal so whatever) we hang out a lot together and talked a lot, I guess you could say that we broke out of our shells (my sister told me to add that metaphor) and after a while we decided to become co-creators of two different comics that I still love working on to this day. (might talk about it more in another chapter) and she also helped me see the light, Gaby was the one who showed me the awesome world of anime and honestly when we became friends the darkness faded away.

she helped me get into an art club that was at my school, more like fought for me to get in which I really appreciated. I had a lot of fun being in that club even though I was horrible at art, to be fair I did more manual stuff than artsy stuff. the art teacher was a weirdo to but he was a lot of fun to work for so I didn't care. I got to talk to a lot more people than before, during that time the only anime I had watched was Beyblade and Pokémon so when they started to make Naruto, fairytail and assassination classroom references I didn't really get it but I didn't mind. lots of things happened that year, I became more social, I made a real friend, I fractured my foot XD, but for the first time I felt like my mask was cracking. like I was finally showing who I really was, im really grateful for my time there because I was finally happy to be at school.

(that's basically it for my school life, ill do my middle school time later on)