Book of Resolutions

Prologue

Pause.

"I DO NOT!"

"Ben? You might as well go start the coffee..." I yawned.

"Your sister...YOUR SISTER..."

"I know. Let me have the phone..."

Ben thrust the phone at me and stormed to the kitchen to start the coffee.

I spoke into the phone in a warning voice: "Katie Lee..."

"That was fun! He's so mad!"

"I wish you wouldn't do that."

"Do you want the tickets or not?"

"To what?"

"The New Year's Eve Ball in Nashville. You know, at that fancy hotel..."

"Katie Lee, that's not really my scene."

"I wish you'd go out and live a little."

"If that's all..."

"So, what ARE you going to do on New Year's Eve? Have a tired old card party?"

"We have fun!"

"You don't even play for money!"

"It's tradition."

"Same round of people every year..."

"I LIKE all my friends and family..."

"You should dress up; put on your good jewelry!"

"I dress up for the card party..."

"Oh wait: you don't really HAVE nice jewelry..."

"Katie Lee! I have some very nice..."

"Poor Lou Anne! Ben's so cheap. I'll loan you something."

I hung up. She called right back and continued as though there had been no disruption.

"We could go shopping; get you a decent dress."

I hung up. She called back.

"Ben can dust off his credit card; buy a tux. Did I tell you about my date?"

I hung up. She called back.

"...or he could rent one. I know this place that has..."

I hung up. She called back.

"Oh, all right then. You don't want the tickets."

"No, I don't."

"Have fun playing Rook. You making any good resolutions this year?"

"No."

"I thought you had fun with your resolutions last year."

"Fun is NOT the correct word."

"This year I'm resolving to be more spontaneous."

"More?"

"Yeah. And adventurous."

"More?"

"Yeah—and to quit DENYING myself."

"Wait, what?"

"And to lose this weight!"

"What?

"I gained 1 ½ pounds over the holidays! Can you believe it?"

"One and a half..."

"I'm such a porker! And I resolve to keep my pedicure current, pay attention to my inner child, live in harmony with nature..."