Distractions (D. SWING)

45

Pride & Embarrassment

Scrubbing with my deepest strengths, I work my muscles into a state of distress cleaning this counter top. My bun holds as much of my hair as it can, with the exception of a few strands of hairs that aren't the length of everything else just yet. The child who happens to be a product of Jared and Vita sits in the corner on the kitchen floor, playing with a fire truck and two smaller cars, a taxi and a mock version of a station wagon. The happiness in his eyes from such a simple set up warms my heart.

I bop to the side as I put an extra umph of elbow grease into cleaning this counter. Lyrics smoothly flow through the house's sound system. "Where ya' at? To all my people with the funk. I'm the undercover brotha',  dump ya' hoe in the trunk!" I have to say this because it is the truth. All of the movies I do have amazing soundtracks... and you know, that's nice and all but, I often dream of doing a huge success in the box office.

It all started this summer. When I thought I was pregnant. Remember the script that I'd got? You might not. If you don't, it's okay. It was a prompt script featuring a random scene for an audition, an audition for a film. A Long Kiss Goodnight was the name. I turned it down because the date for filming was to be early next year... Well, seeing that I was supposed to be pregnant, I turned it down. I would've more than likely been showing by then and the script was really physical. It was supposed to be me and they already casted Sam Jackson. Geena Davis has the role, now, I heard.

Buffy thinks that it could've been altered for me but, I wouldn't want it to be. Not to mention that it requires a certain kind of sexy.

I still get offered roles though. I don't ever want to be at the point where I'm doing absolutely nothing. Even now, I'm not singing but, I'm getting things lined up to open a modeling agency. My last time touching a stage was only three months ago. If we're going to be completely honest... it feels like forever ago. I struggled with it at first. The first few weeks were restless. I tried to start narrowing events down around April so that my body would not go into shock and I was still up. I spent a lot of that time with De— who really was doing his best to help me readjust and I am so thankful for that. Then, once I slept for the first time, I slept until three o'clock. I'm working on finding a balance and as I find the balance, I want to slip a little more acting into it... just a little bit. 

A jingle of keys calls for Killa to spring from the carpet in the next room over, where I last saw him, and sprint to the front door. My eyes shoot to the gate that has been set up to lock both Victor and Chronic in the kitchen as I clean. Chronic sits eating her food in silence without a hint of interest, the poor baby's in heat. I wish I could tell you where Skillz is. He's the silent one anyway. Needless to say, everybody seems to understand that Daddy's home.

"Nel, you be playin' the good shit!" I hear Jared yell as he makes his presence known. "Aye! Hot sex onna' platter! Hot sex onna' platter!" His chanting along to the stereo is enough to take me out. Giggling, I reach across the counter for the remote to temporarily lower the volume of the music. His face becomes visible as he creeps around the corner. "I got what you asked for." He holds up a bag with the herbs I requested for tomorrow's dinner.

I grab the bag with my left hand, still cleaning with my right. "Thanks, J." I revert my attention back to my cleaning as I await the entrance of my boyfriend. A couple of seconds go by until I see hefty denim and a leather jacket extending over the gate to enter the kitchen. "Hey, De." I mumble.

As he gets closer, I pause to extend my neck, giving him access to kiss me. With a quick peck on my cheek, he says to me, "Wassup, baby." He drops his keys on the island and shuffles over the refrigerator. "I know you cleanin' up and you feelin' right and all'at but, don't forget we got to go out. I wantchu' to see this one place up east." I turn around to him passing Jared a bottle of water as he slides his ass on my clean counter tops. I just scrubbed that island.