Forgotten in the Shadows [boyxboy]

Chapter: 16- Christmas Eve (Part Two)

Chapter: 16- Christmas Eve (Part Two)

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Asa's POV

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I got up from the couch just as my mother came back from the kitchen. It was nearing nine o' clock and I haven't heard from James...or anyone for that matter. Guess I really was forgotten. I shook my head harshly, trying to get the thought out of my head. If I were to let a simple boy mess with me like that mentally, I would've shut my trap and stayed with my father. Hell, I would've let him rape me too. Kidding. I just really need to keep my distance from that boy. I mean I love him so darn much but there is that fact that... well he's done so much to hurt me. But i've also done so much to hurt myself. I cause drama, I know that. I hate it, and i just wish one day if I get up and leave, he'll follow and drag me back in his arms. I know, i can't seem to make up my mind. I love the guy but it just seems like he likes to see how mad i can get with what he says.

I mean there's the fact that he went to the winter dance with some guy who i still can't stand, and a bunch of other crazy B.S. I just want a real, normal life and relationship. I want a guy who can hold me in my sleep when the thunders growling in the air, and a guy who'll brush away the tears from my eyes when I'm crying. James has only stopped my crying once or twice, but i need a guy who can do it every time. I am not asking for a lot, I just want what emotionally I need.

I looked at my mothers hands as they were frantically waving in my face due to my minor spacing out. Opps. I blinked my eyes a few times before gaining full awareness of the situation. My eyes felt wet and sticky as I blinked and I reached up and felt my eyes were wet. Was I crying?

"Hun, are you okay? You just stopped walking and next thing I know, your crying. What's on your mind, baby? I know this has been hard for you. Hell, this has been hard for us all. I just want to make sure your okay. I love you." My mother cooed, in her warm and concerned voice.

"I'm fine mom. just a little tired, is all. Hey can I use your phone? I need to call my friend James, I think i left my phone at his place.." I whispered, afraid my voice would crack. And just my luck, my voice did crack.

My mother narrowed her eyes a little before digging into her pocket and fetching out her dated cell phone. "Make it quick, Asa! that thing doesn't hold much minutes!" My mom hollered as I quickly ran down the hall and into the bathroom.

Once i was in the familiar bathroom, I ran my hands over the sinks fine architectural crafting and slowly slid against the wall facing the sink. I flipped open her phone and dialed the oh so familiar number and waited.

Five rings later, i heard a questioning voice answer. "Hello?" James answered.

"Hi, James..." I croaked out, my thumb tracing over the indent the phone had on it's back. I couldn't bare say more, because if I did, I know I would die in at least one way, shape, or form. I hate feeling this way. Feeling like I'm not good enough for him, like he deserves better. And you know what? He does. He deserves so much more love than what I give him. What I give him isn't classified as love. No. It's called pathetic drama. And worst of all, I can't be the better person and tell him how I feel. Tell him that he should have better, because I know that once I say that, he will realize that I'm right, and he'll want me out of his life in a matter of minutes.

"Hey... who is this?" James said, instantly causing my eyes to prickle. I get I called from an unknown number, but shouldn't he be able to remember my voice? Shouldn't he be worried? Shouldn't he be running around town looking for me? I mean I've been gone for hours now. What gives? But that's just me, that drama king.