i can't stay mad at you

sixteen

Miles

When I pull up to Olivia's, my palms are sweaty and disgusting. I have this thing where whenever I feel even the slightest amount of anxiety, my hands sweat intensely. I think it's a real condition. I parked across the street, still deciding whether I should go knock on the door or text her to come out. I'm not exactly ready to be introduced to parents and considering the fact that there are several cars in the drive way, they have to be home.

With one last attempt to dry my hands, I rub them against my jeans and pull out my phone.

I'm here

There. I will probably regret choosing to just text her later on when I am replaying this entire night in my head. About a minute later, I notice her bouncing out of the house, hair as fluffy as ever. She is wearing black ripped jeans, and a tan sweater. Nice and casual. We make eye contact and exchange small awkward smiles.

"Okay we need to talk," She says when she gets in the car. My heart thumps involuntarily. What the hell did I do already?

"What?"

She looks at me with her eyebrows raised, "You cannot just text a girl you're coming hours earlier than planned with no warning! You left me with five minutes to get ready."

I actually sorta smile before responding, "My dearest apologies." I put my hand to my chest and turn towards her. "It was a last minute decision, and besides, you look fine." Honestly, she looked more than fine. Amazing.

She just smiled, crossed her arms and turned to face forward. I took the car out of park and began the trip to the seawall. I don't know why I chose to go there, just seemed like it would be peaceful. Plus, its not as cold out today, so it should be at least a little enjoyable. Also, since I made the dumb decision of having us go see a movie. I figured we might actually be able to talk while walking by the water.

I look over when I hear her rolling the window down. The car immediately fills with cool air.

"Aren't you cold?" I ask, secretly being the one who's cold.

She turns to me, "Not really, I'm used to it. I get car sick sometimes, and I just need some fresh air for a bit," She admits to me, looking almost nervous.

"Oh that's...cool."

Her hand jerks to the button, "I can bring it back up if you want me to-"

"No please don't, the last thing I need is you throwing up in my car," I say it as a joke, but it definitely does not come out that way. She awkwardly turns her head back out the window. Am I wrong for not wanting puke in my car? Okay no, I'm just an asshole. I cant start this date off like this. How the fuck do I turn the mood around?

"So um do you miss your old town?" I take a hand off the wheel and ruffle my curls out of my face out of nervous reaction. My anxiety begins to hit a point of turmoil at the thought of this date already going to shit.

"Honestly, not too much. I've adjusted pretty well here." I stare ahead at the traffic but I feel her turn to face me. "Plus I don't mind the people all that much. When they're nice." Her remark was clearly directed towards my earlier douche moment, but I can't help but find it kind of cute.

"So you don't miss your old friends at all?"

"Of course I miss them sometimes. But sadly all those friendships pretty much mostly faded. Even my best friend. I still talk to her sometimes, but it's definitely not the same." Shit, here I am trying to brighten the mood and start conversation and it's actually just making her sad. Again, my hand moves towards my messy  hair.