Muted Voices

40

I grip my phone as I sit down at a bus stop bench pretty far away from my house.

I find Kenny's contact and I call him.

The phone rings five times before he picks up, "Tweek! Hey-"

"You wanna t-tell me what the fuck is going o-on?"

He sighs, "Okay, I don't know how bad this is from your point of view, but- Are you crying?"

I wipe my face, putting my phone down on my lap.

"Tweek? Dude? Are you okay?"

"N-No," I cry out, the tears keep pouring and I fruitlessly try to wipe them away.

"Okay. Tell me where you're at- I'll come get you. Just stay where you a-"

"N-No!" I interrupt. I don't want to see Kenny at all right now. This was a mistake. I think I'm going to die. I heave out my breaths trying to remain calm, "F-Fuck off. I-I can't deal w-with this r-right no-now."

"Tweek, I-" I hang up. I twitch and jitter more than ever as I attempt to find Clyde's number, but I give up and decide it is easier to just send a text. I'd be a wreck on the phone.

Tweek: Clyde pleas cime ppick me uop
Clyde: where r u
Tweek: Busstop nearchurchst
Clyde: omw

I feel my heart race as I pull my legs up to my chest on the bench. I shiver and the tears keep coming and I can't hear and yet I can hear everything and I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this. I can't breathe anymore and I can feel my own skin sticking to my bones.

I need to calm down. I need to calm down. I need to calm down. I can't calm down-

I cover my ears to try and stop the onslaught of erratic, loud thoughts bursting in my head, deafening me.

I don't remember how long I was there before Clyde showed up. I scrambled off the bench and jumped into the back seat on the driver's side of Clyde's car.

Clyde was in the passenger seat and Token was in the driver's seat and Token looked back at me through the mirror.

"Tweek, dear, you're okay," he says trying to focus both on me and on driving. Clyde was asleep in the passenger's seat leaning on the window. "I'm going to take you back to my house and you can stay for the night, okay? Everything is going to be fine, I swear."

I wipe aggressively at my face, hiding it in my hands.

I continue to cry and Token helps relax me by quietly cooing that everything will be okay. "Let it all out, it'll make you feel better. It's okay."