OKAY THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT READ THIS: this chapter is long overdue. but i had this planned like in january ok, and then i built up to it, and the things that happen in this chapter (and future chapters) were supposed to happen in like april. so can we just pretend that i havent been too busy to write and its april. not like almost october. understando amigo? ok. APRIL HUEHUEHEU right proceed to chapter!!
GRACE
On this sunny, and suprisingy warm April day, Marcel and I are sat inside. Marcel and I watched “Inglorious Basterds” again. I think this might be our 3 time watching it together. We have this thing when we were going to watch a film; every other time we get to pick. And every time Marcel picks, there is a 50 percent chance he would pick “Inglorious Basterds”. I was okay with that; it is a good film, after all.
We listened to Ed Sheeran’s new album after that. I thought “Thinking Out Loud” was beautiful. So after we had actually completed listening to album, I put that song on replay. We were currently listening to it for the 7th time, and for every time Marcel would learn more of the lyrics. I don’t think he’s even aware of what a great voice he has. We’re lying in his bed, and he is holding my hand as he sings with Ed.
Take me into your lovin’ arms
Kiss my under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
Thinking Out Loud
I couldn’t help but think how great friends Marcel and Ed would be. They are both so simple, and don’t need a lot. All they need is to be surrounded by people they love, and are loved by. Also, some surrounded with music. If that had that I think it wouldn’t matter where they were. They could just crash on each other’s sofas in their small London based flats. Ed would play his guitar and they would harmonize, and it would sound like an angel choir. Gosh, they even look like angels.
“So do you”, Marcel whispers.
“What?”
“You were literally thinking out loud”, he laughs. Oh, this boy and his puns and silly knock-knock jokes. He is a dork, but simultaneously so fucking attractive. Boys like that had always been my weakness and now I have one of my own.
“I need to pee”, I excuse myself, and let go of his hand.
“Finally, I can change the fucking track!” He exclaims with joy. He jumps up, placing himself on his knees over the duvet.
“You know, I can hear the music from the bathroom, so don’t you dare”, I say and try to act crossed with him. I walk away, but he tugs my hands, and spins me back to him. It was a very movie-like scene.
“Don’t be crossed bae, I’m not going to change it.” Our foreheads are touching and I’m cradling his face, and his arms are snaked around my waist. It is so beautiful, and then this dork ruins the moment by starting singing too loud and out of tune, that I think I’m going to go deaf.
“PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS! AND MAYBE IT’S ALL PART OF A PLAN!”
“Shush, you goofball!” I laugh as I exit the room, and I can still hear him singing while I pee. I notice the lack of toilet paper, and sigh. This always happens to me. I reach over to the cabinet under the sink to get a new roll. I pause when I see the pink tampon box next to it. It gets me thinking, when was the last time I had my period?
I started counting back the weeks, until I finally came to the conclusion that I hadn’t had my period since before Marcel’s birthday. The day we fucked, and the thought that we did it without any protection just struck me. That was almost 2 months ago. I sat back, my trousers still around my ankles. I started imagining me sitting here with a pregnancy test in my hands. I can’t be pregnant. I can’t have a fucking child. Marcel can’t have a fucking child. He is still working out who he is, and handling his life with me. He’ll lose his shit if a child suddenly comes into the picture.
“Shit”, I whispered to myself. “Shitshitshitshitshit!”
Marcel is going to university in less than six months. He is so gifted and will be offered scholarships to endless amounts of schools. All he’s ever wanted was to go to this amazing college in London. I don’t even know if I’ll get the grades to get me into university, let alone one in London. And even if I did, we couldn’t bring a child. As students, we only have the essentials and a limited amount of money. Even if we put our back accounts together, we couldn’t fend for a child. On top of that we have lectures and studies, and not enough time to care for the child.
There is still a possibility that I’m not pregnant though. And that thought eases my mind. Maybe, just maybe, I’m just very late. Maybe.
“Grace?” I suddenly hear Marcel call. I do what I have to do in the bathroom, shimmy my jeans up my legs and walk out to him. He is lying on the bed, singing to himself and it seems like he doesn’t have a care in the world. But that is about to change very soon. He notices me fidgeting with the hem of my shirt and the bite on my lip. His eyebrows furrow, as he understands that something is not a right.
“Babe? What is it?” He asks, and he shoots himself up into sitting position. I’m about to burst into tears as he comes closer to me. He quickly wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head.
“Hey, Grace, you can tell me anything.”
How the hell am I supposed to tell him that there is a possibility that I’m carrying his child? How the hell am I going to tell him that he might not get to go to the college of his dreams?
“Marcel, I’m scared”, I softly whisper.
“What is there to be scared of? Please, you have to let me help you”.
“I might be pregnant.”
I just everyone to know that if they ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. I read every single message and comment on every chapter. If you've ever commented that you're having a bad time, I see it. I might not reply, but I see all of you. So don't be afraid to come and talk to, okay? I've been through some stuff and maybe I can relate or at least be there for you. I really do care about all of you. Even though I'm not that active because of school, I still check wattpad occasionally. Leave me your worries and thoughts, I really don't mind. I want to help. You don't really have to have problems either. If you just want to tell me about your day that's fine too. If you want to tell me that you're crush smiled at you today, that's completely fine. I can start:
There is this cute boy at school, and I've never even talked to him, but I sent him a friend request on facebook, and he accepted me. So, he knows that I excist (which is a start). But, like where do I go from here? Take in mind that I'm not very good with social things. I get anxiety and I'm really scared to talk to him or make the first move. I'm scared I might annoy him, or that he thinks I'm lame. And we study completey different things, and we don't have any subjects together, so idk what to do? Any love gurus that might be able to help?
shagniall ✌
YOU ARE READING
Marcel (Marcel/Harry Styles)
FanfictionHe wears big glasses and has a big brain, but also a big heart. If he ever got the chance to love a girl, he would do it right. But nobody ever gave him a chance. Until Grace. His first friend. His first love. Someone who would change Marcel.
