Accidentally Bound | BoyxBoy

03; sexuality

"Guess it's goodbye then." That was what Tang Rui's boyfriend in his high school years, Paul Lin told him before leaving him in the rain. He was 18 then - to be exact, he had just graduated from high school. That day, they just returned from a disastrous date that none of them enjoyed due to them being too timid to look at each other properly in the public. Of course that happened - in fact, that was the case whenever they were together for they were still closeted.

Earlier, before Paul Lin bid his permanent farewell to Tang Rui, Paul boldly tiptoed, pulled Tang Rui's head towards him and smacked a kiss on his wet lips. His hair was drenched then, and rainwater could be seen dripping from his hair, to his face, then finally his chin. Tang Rui oh-so-wanted to push the former away as kissing him in the public would bring outrage, especially in this heteronormative society they lived in. But, he couldn't bring himself to do so. Now, his index finger came into contact with his quivering lips, feeling the touch of Paul's lips lingering on his as the latter disappeared in the rain.

Pita, pata. The rain continued to pelt onto the ground and the sound of the thunder could be heard roaring from afar. The sky darkened into an oddly aesthetically-pleasing gradient of dark grey and indigo as the strong wind blew by every now and then. Ironically, the weather perfectly depicted the chaos in Tang Rui's heart. Tang Rui shut his eyes for a second as the rain completely drenched his entire self as if it was mocking at him right now. His first relationship ended with him breaking it off with Paul, and now a sense of emptiness began to sweep over him.

Paul was the first and only gay man he met in his school. Despite the homophobic nature of their high school, he was able to relate with Paul when he privately came out to him. But, nothing exactly last forever and that goes the same with relationships.

Smiling bitterly to himself, Tang Rui shook his head, entered his apartment building and walked up the staircase. When he reached the front of his doorstep, he prepared to remove his shoes and twisted the doorknob.

Before he knew it, he was greeted with a splash of water and subsequently, a slap in the face by his oh-so-beloved biological father.

"You unfilial bastard!" Screamed his father as another slap slammed forcefully on his left cheek. Staring bewilderedly at him, Tang Rui's mouth gaped open as he blinked profusely. What the fuck?

"You disgusting piece of... I saw all that! You were kissing... kissing... kissing a fucking man! How gross is that?!" Peering his eyes to the side, his mother could be seen giving him that... disgusted look, as if she was agreeing with what his father had just blurted out. For the entirety of his years on Earth, this was probably the one and only time his mother could agree with his father.

"I..." Tang Rui's voice trailed away. He saw that? Stunned, he blinked and he tried to comprehend what was happening now. Seeing revulsion painted all across his father's face, his shock dissipated as his fingers started to curl up into a ball. What could he even say? Apologise? Why did he have to apologise? Why did he have to apologise to the dad who only bothered with his alcohol and cigarettes? Why did he have to apologise to the mom who threw him to his grandmother when she couldn't give a damn about him? Biting his bottom lips, Tang Rui realised that there was no point in hiding his sexuality any further. 

As such, he looked at his father in the eye and responded, "I am gay." With that, his father prepared another slap and before it could make an impact on his face, Tang Rui's swift reaction caught his hand and he shoved it back.

Boiling in anger, his father spat at his face as he spatted, "You're a fucking disgrace to the family! I've raised you all my life, and now you're telling me... you're into men?! I raised you to be a man, and not like a man!"