ICON OF THE FIGHT

PROLOGUE

On March the 6th, 2019 at 0800 hours Central African Time, Badaran citizens who were tuned to the hugely popular radio station Bad1 FM heard the following:

Dj: ....If you're just tuning in, welcome to hot, hit radio with your guy Doctor Lyrical, the professor of radio...And what a great tune this number beneath my voice is. It actually won the Outstanding Song of the year award five years back... But the J Kits has been radio silent for some time now... wonder what is he up to. Well, more...

[The sound of glass shattering]

Dj : What the hell!

Voice 1: FREEZE, RADIO-MAN!

Dj: What's going on here?..SECURITY!

Voice 1: [laughing ] Really? Can't you see we're the fathers of security.

Dj: But...but...we're still on air...lemme just switch off...

Voice 1: [CLICK] Don't you move, Doctor Quizzical...

Voice 2: [discreet cough] Um, sir, it's Doctor Lyrical...

Voice 1: Ha! Dash it! Lyrical, Quizzical...sound the same to me.

Dj: But sir, we are still ON AIR! People out there are hearing everything... i should switch off...

[Click! Click! BANG!]

Voice 1: I told you not to move.

Dj: Aaaaargh! My knee...you shot my knee.

Voice 1: What do you mean I shot your bony knee? I was aiming for your stomach. Dash it! This gun is bad. Colonel, hand me your sidearm.

Voice 2: Here you are, General.

Voice 3: What is all this freaking fracas in my studio?

Voice 1: Hey you, stop right there, fat guy! Who are the hell are you?

Voice 3: Who am I? I am the station manager... Wait a minute, I know you. You're Brigadier General...

[BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click! Click!]

Voice 3: Oh, shit! You almost shot me!

Voice 1: Aww, dash it! You're alive? I missed? I can't have missed. Guns these days, you can't trust them anymore. Troopers! Take this fat guy with glasses and suspenders out of here...Hey, I mean him! The civilian, not me. Dash it!

Dj: I'm bleeding out, I need an ambulance...

Voice 1: I'll tell you what you need, it's a bullet to the head.

Dj: No! No, please!

[Click!]

Voice 1: Colonel, is your puny Glock jammed?

Voice 2: No, General. It's empty.

Voice 1: Aww, dash it! Give me the rifle.

Voice 2: But, sir, we are not supposed to kill civilians...

Voice 1: Your objections are noted, now give me the gun.

[Click, clack! BANGBANGBANGBANG...]

Voice 1: Ooooh, yeah! The dockey jisk is dead! No missing with an M-16.

Voice 2: We should go, now that we've secured the station, sir.

Voice 1: Go? Go? We are not leaving until I address the nation.

Voice 2: But, sir, the plan was to let the Air Chief Marshall do all the talking...

Voice 1: Don't talk to me about the plan, Colonel! I was there when we made it, remember? Now, which one of these fancy buttons is for the hydroplane?

Voice 2: Hydroplane, sir?

Voice 1: Yes, you know, the speaky-thingy that makes my voice go on air.

Voice 2: You mean the microphone, sir. It's already in the 'on' position.

Voice 1: Ok. ATTENTION, CITIZENS OF BADARA! THIS IS BRIGADIER GENERAL FOOMBU OF THE BADARA NATIONAL ARMY! THE MILITARY IS TAKING OVER THE RUNNING OF OUR GOVERNMENT AFFAIRS! THIS HAS BEEN NECESSITATED BY THE WANTON DISREGARD OF OUR FOUNDING PRINCIPLES BY SIMON SAIZI'S LEADERSHIP! HE WAS SELLING OUT OUR COUNTRY TO THE CHINESE IN A BASKET! NOW WE WILL GIVE THEM HIS BODY IN A CASKET!