South Park (x Reader)

40) Eric Cartman x Reader {Smut}

Hate Sex

I watched the bitch walk towards our lunch table, an obvious scowl on my face.

"Who the fuck invited her?" I snarled out.

Kyle rolled his eyes. "She's my cousin fat ass, I did. Everyone but you likes her."

"Because she's a bitchy slut!" I yelled.

She smirked, now in hearing distance. "I'm only a bitchy slut because I haven't slept with you."

I groaned, a light pink dusting my cheeks at her angelic voice. "Whatever whore, I wouldn't sleep with you if you paid me!"

"Mm good, wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on Earth fatty."

She smiled at me, blowing a kiss my way. I gagged, rolling my eyes.

"God you two need to just fuck and get over yourselves!" Kenny said, laughing.

"Hell no! My cousin wouldn't stoop so low as to sleep with Eric!" Kyle said, a red face due to anger.

(Name) giggled, covering her full mouth. "Don't hold your breath Kyle, Eric is quite good looking. If only he wasn't a huge dick!"

I blushed a deeper shade of pink, looking just as shocked as everyone else. "But until then, fuck you fat ass, I hate your guts. Also, side note, screw you guys I'm going to class."

She slid her tray full of food to me and walked away. I sighed, pushing the food away and slamming my head repeatedly on the table. "Every. Fucking. Time."

"God I'm so for real," Kenny started. "Just fuck her!"

"I can't just fucking fuck her you poor piece of crap!" I rolled my eyes. "Everytime she's around I panic and act like a dick!"

"Here's an idea Cartman!" Kyle said, looking pissed. "Don't be a dick!"

I slapped a hand to my forehead, mouth agape. "Oh wow! If only I had thought of that!"

Stan and Kenny laughed at the sarcasm, Kyle just grunted. "Whatever fat ass, it wouldn't fucking kill you to try and be nice."

I ignored them, not bothering the food or paying attention. All I could do was sit there and think of how I can get her to know I'm not a dick. I smiled, jumping up and slamming my hands on the table. "THAT'S IT!"

I ran off before anyone could process what had happened.

After five minutes of running across the school I found (Name) sitting at her desk, head down and eyes closed. She had her pink and black headphones in listening to music. I pushed her out of the desk with my foot. She screamed and rubbed her ass. "What the fuck you fucking fuck?!"

I laughed, helping her up.

"C-Cartman? Are you alright?" She asked, confusion on her face.

"Let's fuck."

Her face turned a deep red, shock written all over it. "What?!"

"You heard me. People that hate each other fuck all the time! That's where rough sex originated from!"

"I... I really don't think that's true Cartman. Besides, we're at school you idiot!"

"Kenny fucks sluts all the time here!"

She rolled her eyes, a laugh leaving her lips. "Why would I have sex with you Eric? You're a total dick all the time."

I growled, growing aggravated and slammed my lips to hers. "Please, I'm not a dick on purpose. I just get nervous around you because I think you're hot."

"You're still a dick."

I lifted her up, setting her on the desk in front of me. She shivered when my hand went up her shorts rubbing her through her panties. (Name) gasped, grabbing my wrist and trying to push it away.

"That sensitive huh?"

She bit her lip, a suppressed moan leaving it before she threw her head back and covered her mouth.

I smirked, getting on to my knees and moving the shorts and panties to the side. Blowing cold air caused her to moan quietly. I licked up her folds, my tongue swirling around her clitoris in circles. She moaned loudly, her chest rising and falling heavily. Smirking at my work I pulled away, unbuttoning my shorts and pulling them down along with my boxers.

She looked at me with a deep blush and half lidded eyes, moaning when I rubbed the tip against her wet folds. "I'm gonna fuck the shit out of you."

I grabbed her hips, pushing her smaller frame onto my member.

"E-Eric! Fuck!"

I covered her mouth, thrusting as hard as I could. Her walls twitched around me, sending waves of pleasure through my body. "God damn (Name), we should've done this forever ago."

I lifted her, turning and sitting on the desk. She instantly started bouncing, matching my thrusts. I grabbed her breast through her shirt, hearing her moan my name quietly in my ear.

I felt her twitch more, she must be close. I smacked her on the ass, smirking at the red handprint on her (s/c) skin. "Fuck you're so tight and twitchy, I love it."

I switched places, laying her on the desk and lifting a leg over my shoulder. My right hand on her throat, and my left rubbing her bundle of nerves furiously.

"Fuck Cartman!"

"Call me Eric!" I growled out.

"E-Eric!" She moaned out, her walls tightening around me.

After a few more thrusts I pulled out, releasing all over her legs. "This might... Sound crazy but... You wanna go out later?"

She smiled, kissing me on the lips. "I'd love to Eric."

"Love you, bitch." I said, smiling.

"Love you too, fat ass."

"ERIC CARTMAN AND (NAME) (L/NAME), YOU TWO ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE M'KAY?!"

"Oh shit." We said together, laughing.

(Yoooooo gettin it done my dudes! I'm doing a human Towelie next bc I love Towelie. We have lots in common, like finding the beat to funky town, annoying everyone by just showing up, and saying really stupid and aggravating things. Plus hey, I like blue and stripes! 😂😂)