Chasing Amy (Complete)

9

"I'm kind of dating Tris Prior," I answer. Amy almost spits out her water.
       "Isn't that your ex-boyfriend's daughter?" She blurts.
       "Yes, but..." I start.
       "Isn't she sixteen? Are you a pedophile?"  Amy laughs, but I can't tell if it's sincere.
      "No, I'm not a pedophile. I'm aware that it's not legal, but she kissed me, and we're not together together. We don't have real labels. We're just... mrrmzeep and jinglebin."
      "That's what Jake labeled us as before we started a real relationship! Jeanine, please don't be a criminal!" Amy sighs.
       "Amy, don't worry! It's fine! She's almost nineteen now (A/N this story takes place when Tris is 18) and don't forget that I'm a faction leader. I don't follow rules, I make them. And when necessary, I break them," I say.
     "I almost forgot," Amy says quietly.
      "Don't worry about it."
      "What's Erudite like now?" Amy asks.
      "It's unbearable, but it's slightly less unbearable now that you're here," I answer. Amy grins.
      "'It's slightly less unbearable now that you're here'! I've found the title of Jeanine Matthews's sex tape!"
     "How did you know?" I gasp sarcastically.
     Amy laughs, but it slowly dies away.
      "You're joking, right?" She asks meekly. I chuckle and punch her lightly.
       "Yes."
      Amy glances at her watch and sighs.
      "Aw man, I've gotta go. Cross your fingers that I'll manage to hide my divergence in the final test if I'm even allowed to take it!" She says, getting up. I jump to my feet and walk her to the door. I hug her one last time before she leaves. We've been talking less and less, but I don't blame her. With the Dauntless leader training she's very stressed, but it's almost completely over now.
      After I sit down at my dining room table, an upsetting feeling washes over me. Maybe I don't want her to take the test. I designed it, there's no possible way for her to hide the fact that she is not purely Dauntless.
      I try to make myself eat something, but the guilt has taken my appetite. I force myself to change and go to bed, but I can't sleep.
      Out of nowhere, I get incredibly nauseous. I haven't vomited since I was a young child, though. Nobody knows why. I've tried to make myself throw up before, but was unsuccessful.
      Despite knowing that I won't throw up, I stumble to the bathroom and drop my head above the toilet bowl. The room is spinning all around me and my body is pulsating with heat. I try to stick my fingers down my throat to make myself vomit, but just end up gagging. A tear escapes my eye, and I start to sob uncontrollably. My suffering is unbearable, and for a moment I'm desperate to end it. But I don't. I'm not the same person I was nineteen years ago years ago.
      When I wake up, I'm back in my bed. Someone must've moved me. I sit up and realize that I feel better. I smile slightly. Then I notice a small note on my bedside table.
      Hi Jeanine,
Marcus's memorial is today at 4pm. Please come, as he was a faction leader. I left something in your closet when I dragged you from your bathroom to your bed.
      Evelyn
      P.S. it took a lot of self control to not lie down next to you ;)
      I roll my eyes. Apparently Evelyn hasn't caught on to the fact that I don't want to be in a relationship with her. It was a very sweet gesture though, bringing me to my bed when I was apparently too weak to do so myself.
      I yawn, then force myself out of bed. I see a hint of navy blue peering out of my closet but decide to ignore it. I look at the clock that's hanging on the wall. It's 10:47. I still have a lot of time, so I decide to call Tris.
      "Hello?" She answers after only two rings.
       "Good Morning. Are you going to be going to Marcus's memorial?" I ask.
      "Yes. Are you?"
      "Yes. I don't see the point, but Evelyn really wants me to come." I snort.
      "Yikes. Well, I'll be there. If my father is going to be there, which he will be, boy are we fucked." Tris says.
       "Oh, right. Because... yes." I don't know how to tell her that I've had a child with her father.
      "Are you not telling me something?" She asks suspiciously.
      "No. I'll see you there?"
      "Okay. Bye, Jeanine."
     Tris hangs up, and it feels like a bunch of weight has been lifted off my shoulder. I put down my phone, but instantly receive a text from Evelyn.
      Can we talk?