leave out all the rest. - [jikook] | j.jk & p.jm

《▪forgetting all

However, I wasn't okay. That moment in the room refuses to leave me alone and it makes me undoubtedly disturbed, concerned and scared.

I tried telling myself that everything will be fine. I was just overthinking. It will all be fine.

"Until this cold winter ends," he looked at the crowd of our beloved ARMY cheering for the sweet angel before them.

"And the spring comes again," I saw his tears roll down his face. I saw it from him slightly turn to the side.

"Until flowers, they bloom again," and then his head turned to our direction. My eyes widened as I was looking at his full face now. His eyes were red and tears were falling down. My chest hurt seeing my adored hyung like that.

Until there it was, a pause caused by such a dreadful deed.

Six shots fired. All at Jimin. Three at his front and three from his back.

Everything around me went void and cold at that moment.

All I could hear was the voices of the horrified ARMY muffled away as Jimin's shaking breath from the microphone and the silence filled my ears.

All I could see was him.

His tears, rolling away, tired of being held in.

His eyes turning dull, with the sight of hidden pain giving up.

His lips, where he held his screams by biting on them so many times till they were swollen.

His wounds, physical and emotional.

I saw him.

Only him.

The broken him.

"Please wait for me, and stay where you are." He was shaking on stage, red fillling up his shirt at an alarming rate. Amidst it all, he continued. He continued and that was when I realised.

He was looking directly at me.

His eyes met mine.

And that was when I realised one more thing, he sang the exact same lyrics in his room.

He looked at me with the same gaze he gave me then.

Broken. Hurt. Tired.

Keeping in all the pieces together but still falling apart.

Hurt from something that tears him apart so much.

Tired of hiding it all behind to a point where the pieces just fell apart on their own, in signs of his teardrops.

Unable to keep it in any longer, pieces crumbling down slowly, uncontrollably, and painfully.

It was all reflected in the same gaze.

And it was at me.

It was at me. Meaning I was a part of this.

He was looking at me specifically and nobody else and held that gaze for five more seconds but felt long enough, to know that I played a big role in the shit Jimin-hyung has had to go through and most probably is still going through.

"Please stay where you are." He flashed a weak smile at me while still looking at me.

And that is when I knew.

I made this mess. I hurt him. I destroyed him.

I hurt Jimin-hyung.

I stood there, frozen in my spot. I wanted to move.