When the Lights Go Out {complete first draft}

Day Two: Starting to Lose Grip

{This is an edited version of the same chapter I posted a couple of days ago. I realised I didn't C+P all of it from my word document}

Friday’s swim meet may be over, but this roller coaster Friday isn’t.

“Congratulations, Marisol,” Kendal said. She jumped on me, not caring that I was wet. I smiled into the hug and then closed my eyes. When was the last time I’d actually hugged my sister? When had we last spent this much time together by the pool – let alone in it? I pulled away, but looked Kendal dead in the eye. “This could be you, you know. You could do this. You know how, Kendal, you could make it.”

                  Kendal scoffed. “What, as good as you? Please, Marisol, we all know that this is your dream. This is what you’re best at, and I can’t compete with that.”

                  I swallowed a lump in my throat. I was good at this, and it was my dream. Everything she’d said was right. I wanted this ever since I could remember, and I wanted to prove that I could do it. But I’m stuck in this limbo now, and I can’t get out of it. I can’t seem to do anything to get out of it. I know I’ll die tonight, and tomorrow will be Friday again. I can make a choice to go to the swim meet, or I can make the decision not to go, but something’s got to chance, I’ve got to try and think this through. I’ve got to realise, I’ve got to figure out, why this is happening to me. Maybe I’m trying to be told something? Maybe I’m trying to be taught a lesson? I don’t know, and my head is swirling just thinking about it. But tomorrow can’t be exactly the same as today.

                  Kendal is right. This is my dream. This is my moment, and no one is going to stop me. My boyfriend, and his pathetic friend aren’t going to stop me, fate won’t stop me, and Veronica won’t stop me. Today, I am invincible, and I won this.

                  “No,” I said, smiling as I pushed all of my negative thoughts away. “But I can train you, every Friday, every day until you finally get as good as me. Kendal, you can do it.”

                  “Oh, shut up. The house isn’t big enough for two swimmers. Mom wants to talk to you, anyway, I can see her poking around from the corner of my eye trying to grab your attention.”

                  “I see her too,” I giggled, “but I’m trying to ignore her?”

                  Kendal gasped. “You bad girl!”

                  Suddenly, the fact that she was hanging around with a dodgy guy, who I hated, didn’t matter. She was my sister, and she cared for me – she was happy for me. I just hoped that she could make the right choices in life. She only had one real chance, after all. “I have to go somewhere, Kendal.”

                  “Where?”

                  I couldn’t answer her, because a part of me didn’t want to go. I wanted to stay here, and be with my family. I wanted to see how proud they were, and how happy I’d made them, but another part of me was trying to solve this puzzle. I’d changed my day, what more did I need to do in order to get my life back? I thought I could just slip back into my body and everything would be alright? But so far, it hadn’t worked. I had another idea, but I didn’t want to go through with it. I was willing to try anything to get my life back. I thought, maybe I was on the wrong path, and I needed to get back onto the right one. Maybe if I broke up with Vincent, I’d wake up on a Saturday, and everything would be back to normal – my path would be different. My future would change, and I’d live longer. It was worth a shot, really. I mean, what did I have to lose? After all, the day I’d died had been because of a party that Vincent had asked me to go to. It made sense, amidst all the things that didn’t make sense.