Stinky Bats

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a/n: A couple months ago I did this weird request thingy and I kinda forgot to post them on here so... yeah.

  criminal comments on how rank the batsuits smell.  

Scarecrow:

"So Mister Scarecrow, on a scale of one to ten how bad does the batsuit smell?"

"What are you doing here kid?"

"Research"

"You should go before–

"Answer the damn question, Jonathan."

"Twenty, he really needs to wash the suit.

Harley Quinn:

"Hiya kiddo! How can I help ya?"

"Hey Aunt Harley, on a scale of one to ten how bad does the batsuit smell?"

"It stops at ten?"

"Eh, Scarecrow said twenty so not really."

"I say bout 14, but don't tell 'em I said that!"

"Don't worry all answers remain anonymous."

Mr. Freeze:

"y/n what are you doing here?"

"Oh you know, just chilling. So question, on a scale of one to ten how bad does the batsuit smell?"

"Why are you asking me this?"

"A friend wants to know."

"I wouldn't know so I'm just going to say 6."

"Thanks, Vic."

Riddler:

"It's not wise for a kid like you to be walking around the streets at this hour."

"Says the guy who got his ass handed to him by Batgirl and a clown."

"....... Get out."

"Kay."

Two-Face:

"Hey, Harvey can I ask you a question?"

"Su–"

"No, get out."

"I wasn't talking to you burnt potato, I was talking to Harvey. Anyways, on a scale of one to ten how bad does the batsuit smell?"

"Hmmm, 10."

"You're not going to flip on it?"

"No that's our final answer."

Killer Croc:

"Nice view."

"What do you want n/n?"

"To ask you what I've been asking almost all of Gotham's underground baddies, on a scale of one to ten how bad does the batsuit smell?"

"..Why are you asking everyone that?"

"I'm getting paid."

"7. Stay safe out there."

"Will do!"

Random Street Mugger:

"Give me all your money!"

"Only if you answer a question."

"Wha? I could kill ya."

"Yeah, so could a duck you're not special. I'll give you 50 dollars if you answer the question."

"Fine then shoot."

"On a scale of ten to twenty how bad does the batsuit smell?"

"Ten to twenty? Shouldn't it be one to twenty?"
"Well everyone but two have been saying numbers above 10."

"10."

"Here's your money."

"Wow, Bat really needs to drop his suit at the dry cleaners," you mumbled as you walked back to your home. You closed your notebook and skipped down the street. You noticed a shadow in the alleyway next to your home and you did what the opposite of what you should not do. Go check what the hell it is. After finding nothing you turned back and crashed into a wall that was not there two minutes ago.

"There goes my nose."

"Sorry."

You looked up and saw that you crashed into your old buddy Red Hood. "Do you have the info?"

"Yup," you said giving him the notebook. He opened it and looked at the information you had collected.

"Good job kiddo," he said giving you a backpack. "Don't waste it all on candy."

"Pfft as if, what are you going to do with that?"

"Make copies and glue them to his room."

"Huh, Have fun!"

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