Aqua Terrarium (Nagi No Asukara)

Chapter Thirty-Two

Still, Chisaki's furtive glances at me spoke well enough. It's obvious that I would have a long discussion with the two of them in the near future.

--*--

It was my first time in the city without my mother and Takashi.

The city was as suffocating as always, lots of cars honking their horns at the traffic and people milling the area like ants. It looked bigger to my eyes without my mother next to me. She always had been a source of comfort whenever we went somewhere new so, without her, the city felt more imposing than it usually did.

"Luckily, they have stations you can soak in in case you dry up." Tsumugu gestures with his glance to the buildings with logos of a whale on them, 'offering free saltwater' and the like written on them.

"So, Tsumugu," Hikari started, obviously doing his best to keep Tsumugu occupied to even approach me. "Where do you think is the best place to look for a gift we can get for my sister?"

"The largest mall here is a few walks away. We can try there." Tsumugu then turned to me. "I also hear that they have a good ice cream parlor there. Don't you think we should try it?"

"U-Um... Sure, we could try it." I stuttered to say, surprised at the sudden attention Tsumugu threw my way. I tried my best to ignore Hikari's suspicious glances as we all silently walked to the mall Tsumugu had indicated.

"Aoi, wait." Tsumugu's voice made me pause before I felt his hands over my shoulder. I flinched at the contact, wondering what he wanted before he gestured me to move aside as he took my place on the edge of the sidewalk.

I kept reminding myself that Tsumugu is a kind person amidst is aloof-looking persona. What he had done was obviously something he would've done to any other female friend he had. I didn't want to get his hopes up, because I care as his friend and he deserved better. That's why I did my best to hide the blush creeping up before muttering a quick 'thanks' as we both walked side-by-side.

I could feel Chisaki and Manaka's eyes boring deep into me as we continued to make our way to the mall, my fingers fidgeting nervously at the uncomfortable attention.

'It's not what it looks like!' I thought loudly, hoping by some miracle that I could transmit to them these words.

If they doubted me, then it would only make me question myself and I didn't want that. It would be playing right into what Tsumugu wants and that would only serve to hurt him more.

I don't deserve him as anything more than a friend.

--*--

The moment we arrived at the mall, I had assumed that Tsumugu would finally tell them that it was about time for us to split off and head on over to our own outing. He looked to be about to do so too but, suspiciously, Hikari had stopped him- telling him that they still needed us to help find the floor that Tsumugu spoke off.

Whether Tsumugu was irked with Hikari because of this, I didn't know. He was completely fine with it (if his nonchalant expression was anything to go by) and I was quite glad that he didn't voice out his complaint.

Truth be told, I doubt I'd be able to keep up with this awkward tension between us.

Making our way to the first few stalls to look for a gift Miuna could give to Akari-san, it was Kaname who had taken Tsumugu's place when Hikari's plan to separate Tsumugu and I had worked.

I was busy perusing a few displays when his shadow loomed over to my side- that usual half-smile of his reflected from the glass we were both looking at.

"It seems that Hikari's hogging Tsumugu all to himself, Aoi. If this goes on then there won't be any time left for just the two of you." He meant it as a harmless jab at Hikari's suspicious behavior and yet I can't help but feel dejected at his words.

Not an ounce of wariness in them, as if he was cheering me on that the date would go well. While it's true that I don't want to ruin the day for Tsumugu, I only meant to do so in the hopes that whatever came out of it wouldn't ruin our friendship.

I'm getting too hopeful... It's not like those cliché shoujo mangas, after all. Kaname had long since confided to me about his feelings for Chisaki so he obviously shouldn't be feeling jealous of the date Tsumugu and I were having.

That's why he'd be more concerned with Hikari hogging all of Tsumugu's attention- for all the right reasons at that too. I should've seen it. Just like me, Kaname's also finally trying his best to get his feelings across to Chisaki. So for Hikari to be forcing Tsumugu away from me means that somewhere deep inside, Hikari's finally given up on Manaka.

If only Hikari knew the truth.

Manaka just hasn't realized that her feelings towards Hikari were beyond the feelings of 'merely friends' (As she would probably defend if I pointed it out to her). If Hikari's plan worked then Kaname's plans to admit his feelings to Chisaki would fall apart and just like Hikari, he'd give up on Chisaki too even if deep down he didn't want to.

It would obviously be in my favor yet the heartache that came with it... I didn't want that. Before that happens- I want to at least confess to him. I want to let him know even if my feelings would not be returned. Maybe, if I did so, then everything would finally be alright...

That's why I couldn't let Hikari get away with it. I can't afford to be a coward now- Tsumugu had to know.

Before my own time runs out, I have to tell Kaname.