A Collection Frerard Crack

Crack Cocaine Trafficking Fic

AN: The idea for this came from when I was talking to my French penpal, Margot, about fanfiction. She is really cool and has amazing taste in music so yeah. She reads fanfiction too, and at this point I was writing up my letters to her in English, and then putting them into google translate then sending them to her. So I had said the phrase "I enjoy reading/writing crack fics" but what google translate had turned it to was "I enjoy reading/writing Crack cocaine Trafficking Fics" I really do to know how it works or why it did that but yeah. So then this Jesus of crack fics was born (I'm kidding this is literally the shittiest thing ever and if you find pleasure in this then you need to find better fics.

---

"ARE YOU READY FRANKIE BBY?" Gerard called from the next room.

"No, I just gotta shave my legs first" Frank shouted back.

"WE DONT HAVE TIME, YOU STOOPID IDIOT WE GOTTA GET THIS CRACK TO PTV BEFORE THEY STEAL OUR POKEMON"

Frank was stuck. He didn't know what to do!

If he didn't shave his legs, then they wouldn't be pretty and Gerard wouldn't want to touch them.

But if he did, then they would be late and not get the drugs to PTV on time, resulting in a loss of their beloved Pokemon.

Frank decides that he values his Pokemon too much to risk it.

Pro Trafficking Vice were their biggest buyers, the group of Mexican youth bought all the crack Frank and Gerard had, with out a second's thought.

Frank ran towards Gerard, "I'm ready to go!" Frank exclaims.

Gerard gives him a big kiss on the cheek and then whispers in his ear "#nohomo".

It made Frank so damn sexually frustrated that Gerard was constantly denying his obvious love for him.

Frank just wanted to frickle frackle Gerard, right there and then, but knew he couldn't.

Gerard was trisexual after all: women, robots and- shit, he could never remember the last (let's just make it clear that he isn't attracted to actual shit cuz it kind of sounded like that).

There was no chance for poor Frank.

Gerard and Frank had been professional crack Traffickers for many years, hiding crack inside their car and bringing it over the boarder to whoever wanted to buy it; usually PTV.

Gerard and Frank got in the car together, and gee started the car.

"I'm sorry I shouted at you earlier you sexy dwarf, how can I make it up to you?"

"You could give me sex" Frank replied.

SHIT. THAT WASN'T MEANT TO BE OUT LOUD! Thought Frank.

"I said, you could just give me Mex. Lyyke Mexican food. Since me are going to Mexico."

"For a second I though you said sex oops lol my bad #nohomo ha" said Gerard quickly.

Frank really, really, REALLY hated this #nohomo thing.

Because Frank was homo.

Very homo.

And so was Gee.

FFS they were as gay as gay could get.

Still, G denied his attraction to Frank.

"AAAAAARRG! A GIANT BRENDON URIE KILLER WASP!" Gerard screamed.

He was right.

There was in fact a giant killer wasp that had Brendon Urie's face on it.

And it was right in front of the car.