"You know I would, but James is in the shower and you know how long he's gonna take. He bought that new body wash, you know the one that says it'll make you smell irresistible? Said that Evans didn't stand a chance against his chat up lines now," Sirius laughed.
"This isn't even the most ridiculous thing he's done to try and get her attention." Remus recalls, "Remember that time he stood up and performed a dramatic reading of Hamlet's famous soliloquy after she rejected him at breakfast?"
Sirius snorts, "Yeah and even then she got really annoyed, what was it she said again?"
"That Shakespeare in modern times was considered sexist, and that she'd rather drown than go out with him."
Sirius turned around to grab his shirt as he laughed, and as he went to tug it over his head, Remus found his eyes drawn to Sirius's rather toned abs. With his long black hair, which was usually tied back, and his athletic body from football, Remus could see why girls tripped over themselves to say hi. Is it weird to think of your best friend as attractive? No, he reasoned, they were close, always have been, and it doesn't mean anything. He's simply making an observation. Unfortunately for him, Sirius had noticed that he was making quite an observation as well.
"See something you like, Moony?", Sirius teased.
Remus chucked a pillow at him, "Piss off, you arrogant idiot."
Sirius laughed and ducked with fantastic speed, and began to button up his shirt.
"But anyway, as I was saying, you'd do well to flirt with a few teachers."
"I don't need any help with my grades, Pads."
It was true, although only on the edge of seventeen, Remus showed remarkable skill and intelligence, according to most of his report cards. Okay, all of his report cards.
"I don't mean grades, we all know you're a big brainbox, but your pickup skills could use some work."
Remus stifled a laugh. "So what, you want me to bed Mr Gerard?"
"Ew, no!"
"Who the hell wants to bed Mr Gerard?" A slightly damp James Potter with a confused and disgusted look on his face entered the room.
"I do, and I think its because of that new body wash he has, it makes him smell utterly...", Sirius paused for dramatic effect, and looked at James, "irresistible."
The next five minutes consisted of a deranged looking Sirius Black chasing James around the room, who was shrieking extremely high pitched and hanging onto his towel for dear life. This ensured a very amused Remus, who was dodging out of the way for fear of being tackled by either a mad man or a naked one. Neither option was desirable.
After James had escaped to the bedroom to get dressed, Sirius collapsed once more onto the reliable chair and threw his legs onto of Remus's bony ones. Remus, now very aware that he is being stared at, turns to face his best friend with a questionable look. If he was hoping for an answer, he didn't get one. Instead, a look broke across Sirius's face. The same one that appears whenever he has an idea that you should most definitely not go along with.
"Oh n-"
"I could give you a makeover!"
Not even able to finish the end of his sentence, Remus blinked slowly in bewilderment, while Sirius, who clearly thought this was the best idea in all of history, looked at him for a jubilant reaction. What he got instead was:
"Sorry, what?"
"A makeover, Moony!"
"Have you gone insane?"
"No! Think about it: all you wear is cardigans, your wardrobe is filled with neutral tones, and your hair has potential for a proper quiff yet you never use any sort of gel and it drives me nuts!"
Trying very hard not to be offended by what seems like the criticism of his entire life, Remus opens his mouth to say something, defend himself or question, he doesn't know. He doesn't find out either, as no sound exits. Taking this as an opportunity, Sirius continues.
"Here's my plan: Four weeks, full control, I take over your decisions of wardrobe, hair and.. mannerisms, and I get you a date."
"Sirius, I don't need to dat-"
"No, come on Remus its perfect! We have our end of year dance in a month or two, and I can get you somebody to go with! You can't keep going stag and getting abandoned by James who spends the whole night trying to dance with Lily."
He was on a roll now. One thing to always take into account when it comes to Sirius - there's no stopping him when he get excited about something. He'll set his mind on it and go for it, full speed ahead. But Remus doesn't want to date. Does he? Would it be such a bad thing? He's at the last few years of his teens, and he's never had a serious girlfriend. He feels there's probably a reason for that, but what if Sirius is right? Is it down to the way he dresses and acts, and if so, does everybody fake a new personality if theirs isn't good enough? What happened to just being yourself? At this point, Remus' brain is fried with confusion and Sirius is waiting patiently - at least for him - for an answer. Remus sighs.
"There is this one girl, I happen to think she's rather sweet."
"Yes! You won't regret this, Moony!" Sirius is beaming like a child on Christmas Day that just got a puppy, and Remus cant help but think that its worth it if it makes Sirius this happy.
"Come on, Pads, we gotta go, class is about to start."
Remus' Realisation
Start from the beginning
