Sweetest Sin (Tony Perry) *SLOW UPDATES*

Chapter Eight

"What does it matter? She's never going to be my kid."

"She's your child. She's my child. Just because Amy and Jon have her doesn't change that. Amy and Jon have made it very clear that as soon as she's old enough to understand everything, she's going to know everything. Amy and I talked about that. She calls me her aunt right now, but as soon as I'm ready we're telling Jordan the truth."

"So why even give her to them?"

"They wanted to have a family for as long as they had been together. They had been trying for years, and I get pregnant when I wasn't ready or stable enough to take care of her."

He looks at me, his face a mixture of anger and sadness, "I just wish I would have at least known."

"I know, I know. I should have told you. But I didn't want to get drug back into that situation. You can ask Lily, I debated on going back to your house and telling you, but I didn't know if I could handle it. I didn't know if you wanted to have a kid. I just knew that you weren't the person that I wanted to be with," I pause, trying to find the right words, trying to figure out how to keep myself from being too emotional. "I didn't want the kid to grow up without a dad around."

"What makes you think I wouldn't have stepped the fuck up?" he asks, his voice evidently hurt by what I said.

I look at him, taking a deep breath, holding back tears, "I didn't know if you would, because of how you had been treating me at the time. You weren't home, you weren't around for me. I wasn't going to have my kid grow up the same way that I had."

I watch as realization crossed his face. I barely talked about my life, I'm not surprised that he forgot about it. He probably didn't remember that by dad left me and Amy and my mom. He probably didn't think about how much that fucked with me growing up, not having my father around. Amy was fine, she was too young to remember what it was like to have a father around. She only ever knew just having mom around.

I take a deep breath, knowing that he doesn't know what to say to me. "I don't expect you to be okay with how I handled everything, but I do hope that you can come into this situation and try to make the best of it. You can hate me, you can say that you never want to see me again, and you can pretty much say whatever the fuck you want about me. But I will not let you fuck with Jordan."

Tony looks at me, "I'm not going to do anything to ruin the life she has, and I couldn't even fathom pushing you out of my life again."

One week later...

"Do you think Vic would be willing to sing on a song with us?" Lily asks, glancing up from the notebook. "I also think this song could have a kickass music video. But I need a dude to sing this one part, and I really think it would be better to have guest vocals. We could play it here and see how the people react to Vic's singing in it."

"Lily," I start, cutting her off, making her stop her train of thought, "I cannot answer for Vic. I can maybe have his girlfriend give her opinion. But I cannot answer for Vic, nor do I want to make decisions for him. So, Lily, would you like me to call Ashley or Vic for you?"

"I guess you can just call Vic. Maybe you can sweet talk him into coming over and looking at it. It's kind of a love song, but it's also kind of screw off song, based on the video I have in mind," she pauses, reading through some lyrics, "Oh! We could even have like Jaime and Mike and Tony in the video with their girlfriends or something."

"I'll just call Vic and see if he's interested in even looking at the song," I say, walking away from the table. It's way too early to deal with her and her excitement.

I step out the door to the bus and walk down the steps before taking a seat against the bus. I pull my phone out of my pocket, scrolling through my contacts to the bottom, hitting dial next to Vic's name.