grace under pressure • jerome valeska

CHAP.45: Secret

  Hathead was in. He decided that he didn't exactly like the situation he was in either, soooo we now had him has part of our plan. The plan was a bit chaotic at this point but it was a work in progress, plus, I didn't really want Jerome and I to stress out. I hated stress with a burning passion so I tried my best to stay away from it. But something else was on my mind at the moment. Jerome. 

  Of course he was almost always on my mind 24/7 because I loved the guy, but something about him seemed...off lately. Well, more off than usual. He seemed to be a lot less focused. He seemed to think off into space a lot more than normal. I had to say I was worried. He was even smiling less. That was very very bad. I was the only one to notice of course but I hadn't spoken of it yet. I didn't know if what I had been seeing was just me being myself or if something was actually wrong. 

  Right now I was playing with a knife in my room out of boredom, throwing it at this red circle on the wall. I hit the bullseye every time. I was skilled with knife throwing. Started to learn awhile back. I wanted a challenge though. Maybe I could paint a red circle onto an inmates back...ugh no. Still boring. I groan, putting my head against the wall behind me. I needed something to do. Killing had just lost it's touch lately. Joking seemed dull. Jerome was the only thing I really looked forward to anymore. 

  I needed something new. Something fresh. Maybe something interesting would come along soon. But as I sit there, I start to think of Jerome. I wonder if this place was finally getting to him. It was hard to think anything  could affect that crazed ginger but I just didn't know. The feeling that came to me was the gut feeling that something was wrong. Yep. I still got those but only on special occasions. This being one of them. Maybe I should talk to him about it. 

  He would deny it. Obviously. He would laugh it off. He wouldn't mention it and drop it. I knew he would do that. It was his nature. His way of life to avoid things he didn't want to talk about. I had that stubbornness as well but not as bad as him. At least...I don't think so. But maybe I could pry it out of him. I was good at that. Taking care of what needed to be done. And this needed to be done. 

  I continued to think about it, the darkness of my room so thick I couldn't see around me. I sigh. I was torn. That is when I heard the voice.

  "Maybe I could help?" I hear. I groan. 

  "I don't need this right now." I say, lifting my head. I hear a small laughter.

  I had been having the voice of none other than my brother Steve around me lately. Just sort of popping up every now and then. I couldn't seem to make it stop and now it had come to a point it was becoming very annoying. He laughs. 

  "Oh come on! You can't think of anything. Let me help!" He tries. I roll my eyes, continuing to play with my knife. 

  "I said no." I sigh. 

  "Actually you said , and I quote, "I don't need this right now"." He says. I breathe out.

  "Same thing." I say, venom dripping off my words. 

  "Well for you yeah, but not for me really because it's quite confusing." He continues on. I growl. 

  "Why do you have to be so annoying?" I hiss. 

  "No idea. Your the one hearing voices here so wouldn't this be you being annoying?"  He suggests. I sit up, throwing the knife at the wall and it landed right in the middle of the red circle even though I could barley see it with my room being so dark.

  "Can you shut the hell up now?" I say, my voice rising. I hear him tsk. 

  "Afraid not. I can't leave until you figure out how to help your little boyfriend." He tells me. I chuckle.