Boarding School {completed}

~ 9 ~

I should stop apologising for uploading late, because I feel like it says I won't do it again, but I know I will, which sucks. I will do my best to upload here more often, if I remember. Haha... Yeah, that's not gonna happen. Sorry :/ I do like this book though. Which is annoying that I can't seem to upload often.

T.W. Possibly, I don't know.

Virgil sighed sadly as he looked up at the stars, he didn't mean to drag Roman into his messed up life. It was insane that he went from not talking to him at all, really, to telling him everything within a few hours, and he wasn't sure if it was a good thing.

He glanced over at Roman, who was laying on his back, staring at the stars in the dark night sky. In that moment, he couldn't have looked more peaceful if he had tried, and Virgil found it amazing that someone could look that amazing.

"You said I look fabulous..." Roman broke the silence, glancing over at Virgil, who flushed slightly, and look away from him.

"No, It's just... I didn't... whatever..."

Roman smiled and nudged Virgil's side, causing him to redirect his gaze back to him.

"What?" He murmured, wondering why Roman was looking at him like that. "Did I do something?"

"No. You're... You're just great." Roman smiled and sat up, leaning on his elbows, continuing to gaze at Virgil.

"I'm not... What part of me is great?" Virgil looked away from Roman, refusing to see his perfect everything.

"Your eyes. They're this brown, that swirls with uncertainty, and fear, but they show how brave you are, and you care. Your hands. They shake, but I see your doodles. The create the most wonderful art, and no one else would be able to think it up. Your mind. It has these amazing ideas, that you keep to yourself, because you think they're not good enough, but they are. Your jacket, it's handmade, right? It's amazing. You're amazing, whether you see it or not. Inside and out, you're great."

Virgil sat up, and laced his hands together in his lap. "I don't..." He sighed shakily, and refused to look at Roman. His words were kind, and honest, and had made him tear up. No one had been that nice to him in years. No one had taken the time to see him, and knowing Roman saw all of that, made him feel much better, but he worried that he was too easy to read. After all those years of building up this heavily fortified wall, he didn't want to be seen into that easily.

"I don't see it. I don't see what you see. I see this... This broken... Child, that can't be fixed, who lives in the past, who is unlovable, and just can't do things right. I appreciate your words, but I don't think you're right." He sighed and stood up. "Thank you, but I... I don't think you understand."

He turned to walk away, and felt a hand on his wrist.

"Virgil. I won't let you keep pushing me away. I want to help. Please, let me in."

"Don't you see. I already did, and I shouldn't have. I messed up, Roman, and I can't fix it. You don't understand, and you never will. I want to have someone there, but I'm too scared to let anyone in, much less anyone like you."

"What does that mean?"

"You... You're perfect. I don't... I can't explain it, you're this... This... You're perfect and I'm not, and I don't know. I can't begin to describe how much I loath you but I don't at the same time. I care for you, despite barely knowing you, but I shouldn't. I'm a bomb waiting to go off. And when I do, I will wipe you all out, and it's going to be bad. You should get away whilst you still can. I don't want to hurt you."

He looked down, tears threatening to spill. As he tried to hold himself together, Roman's grip on his wrist weakened, and he managed to pull away and walk away, back towards the forest he was in earlier that day.

He knew Roman would follow him, but he didn't care. He had had enough, and he needed to get away, he needed to hold himself together, he couldn't break. Not again.

"Virgil would you please listen to me." Roman called from behind him. "I'm sorry okay? I can't help being me. I'm sorry you feel... I don't know, however you feel, I'm sorry you hate me, I'm sorry I'm wrong, and I... I'm... I refuse to be sorry that I care about you, and I refuse to let you go."

Virgil whirled around to face Roman. "I don't want you here. Please... I can't hold back forever, and when I let go... I don't need more pain on my hands. Please."

"You told me you wanted friends, and more than friends. So let me in, let me help you. I care for you, and I know you don't want me to, but I do, and I don't plan on stopping. So listen to me, let me talk to you. Please."

Virgil couldn't hold back, and he broke down. His tears fell freely, and sobs wracked his body. He didn't want to be weak, but he was, and he couldn't help it.

"Roman. I don't...." He sighed and let himself be held. It wasn't that he didn't want it, but he was tried to hold back, and being this close to him didn't help. "Please don't make this harder."

"Make what harder?" Roman stepped back, and rest his hands on Virgil's shoulders, letting him take in everything about him.

"I think it's best I leave. I'm going to leave, I don't belong."

"I won't try and stop you, but, let me do one thing, please?"

"It depends what it is."

"If you're going to leave, I want to be able to kiss you once. If I won't ever get the chance to do it again, I want to do it now. Please. And, sleep on the idea, don't act impulsively."

"I... Okay."

"To which one?"

"Both. I'll think about not leaving, but... You kiss me and then leave for the night. Go back to the dorm. Make up some excuse, say I stayed out to get some air."

"Okay." Roman nodded, and stepped closer to the darkly clad male, taking in everything about him, knowing it could be the last time he saw him. They'd only known one another for two days, but it was hard to think that they may never see one another again. "Is this okay?" He asked as they got closer.

Virgil nodded, he didn't know what he was doing, and he let Roman guide him. One of Roman's hands left his shoulder, and cupped his cheek. Before long, their lips collided, and it was better than Virgil could have ever imagined. He melted under Roman's touch, and in that moment, it was too easy. He could have stayed if that was something he could have everyday.

They parted too soon, and as Roman walked away, Virgil found his heart breaking slightly. He didn't know what he was going to do, but he knew he needed Roman in his life somehow, whether he stays or not would be more difficult to figure out.

Hope you enjoyed
Take care
xx