Beryls and raindrops

Imaginary nails hurt just as much as real ones

When my father grabbed me from under the mango tree in front of our house, I knew something was wrong.
Anger was etched all over his face. The smiling man I knew and loved was irked...more than that, he was vexed.
There were a few things that could anger this man. I decided to keep quiet and obey his command.
My father decided to bathe me himself. He hadn't done that in a long time because he believed I was old enough to do it myself. He sponged my skin so hard, I felt it burning. I shut my eyes to try to think of anything other than the searing pain I felt. He rubbed me sore with a towel and took the time to dress me himself.
"Daddy?" I dared to call. He was acting very strange and I found it unsettling.
"Yes" he answered curtly
"Where are we going?"
The dress he put on me was one I only wore for special occasions. My Christmas dress.
He looked me in the eye. An involuntary shiver went down my spine. His eyes were filled with hate, but they were not for me.
"To see your mother?"

The journey to my mother's home was eerily quiet. It felt like the air was stale around us. I was worried about my father; he never let me sit in the front seat of the car but today he didn't seem to care. I knew my parents hated each other. I had never seen my mother, and my father never told me why. When I asked my aunty, she told me it was because my mother hated me. When I first heard that, it felt like a huge nail had been pierced through me.
I looked at my father with the corner of my eyes. He was the only one who loved me. I could not understand why he was taking me to meet a woman who hated me.
We stopped in front of a building I assumed was a hotel because it was too big to be a house.
"Your mother lives here" he said holding my hand after we got out of the car. He held my hand so tightly, I thought I heard my bones crack, but I didn't utter a sound. I was used to pain. My memories fled to when I lived with my cousin when my father was job hunting. How he molested me everyday. Imaginary nails pierced me then too.
My father seemed to know his way around the hotel-house. Everything was so big and clean. It made me feel a little bit uneasy.
He stopped abruptly and opened the door in front of us. The room was surprisingly plain and ordinary looking. A petite, vulnerable looking woman sat in front of the mirror inside the room. She was incredibly stunning. She reminded me of the stories my father always told me at night. Stories of Mammy waters. Her skin was unbelievably dark and the whiteness of her eyes contrasted it greatly.
"Here she is, Chika" my father said prompting me forward.
The woman smiled at me.
"She's beautiful, but she's a little small for 12, isn't she? Aren't you feeding her properly?"
I could feel the spite radiating from my father.
"This is your mother" my father said, forcing himself to be calm.
I looked at her surprised. My mother's beauty could rival the greatest Mammy water.
"What's her name?" She asked still smiling.
I felt another nail pierce through me. She didn't know my name.
"Kamto" I said before my father could.
"You sound so adorable" she said standing up. She walked up to me and patted my hair.
I looked up to her. The realisation hit me. She didn't care for me as her own child. She was fascinated by me.
I turned back to look at my father. He looked so sad, as if he was giving me away to her. I ran to him and held his hand.
"Let's go home!"
He looked at me surprised.
"Let's go home daddy, I want to go with you, I don't want to stay here!"
And right before my eyes, my father broke into tears. The nails hurt more than ever.

Mammy water- Mermaid.