Love Or Liberation

Chapter 9

The Cuban sandwich shop was quite a walk from Columbia University. It must have been at least a mile. The streets had a lot of traffic noise, so there wasn't much conversation between the three students on their way there. Elaine and Donna were bundled up in their coats, scarves, hats and gloves, but Benjamin didn't even wear a jacket. He seemed pretty comfortable in that weather.

When they got there, it looked like a hole in the wall, but it was warm inside. There was a deli counter as well as some Formica topped tables. Benjamin asked Donna and Elaine what they wanted to drink with their sandwiches and led them to a table where they took off their coats. He said the meal would be on him and he went to the counter to place the order.

"I hope this is good," Donna said to Elaine. "I'm hungry. Are you?"

"I don't know." Elaine's tone was flat.

Elaine looked like she was about to cry, but Donna couldn't tell if Elaine was upset or if it was just the cold.

Donna said, "That was a long walk, and it's freezing out."

Elaine said, "I don't mind the cold."

Benjamin returned to the table with three sodas and straws.

"It won't take much time for them to make the sandwiches." He sat down, and said, "I've been studying Spanish since high school, so I like to explore Cuban and Mexican restaurants near the Columbia campus."

"Like I just told Elaine, that was a long walk, and it's freezing out," Donna said. "But Elaine said she didn't mind the cold."

Benjamin said, "I like to walk all over the city. That didn't seem like such a long walk to me and I didn't notice the cold. You'll see, though, their sandwiches are worth the walk."

"I hope so, I'm hungry."

"So am I." Benjamin turned to Elaine. "Are you hungry, too?"

"Not really."

Donna asked, "Is something wrong, Elaine?"

"I was proud of being a part of the Barnard and Columbia community, but now I'm ashamed!" Elaine started to cry.

Donna said, "Don't let any male chauvinists see you cry. They'll say you're just a weak and overemotional woman and that will justify their lack of respect."

Elaine said, "I don't care what anyone says! I didn't realize my privilege was at the expense of other human lives."

Benjamin handed Elaine a napkin and said, "It's all part of the Establishment. It's not your fault. You have a good heart. Just bringing out the truth and making it known is a major step toward improving society. That's why I want to be an investigative journalist."

"I don't know about that, I mean that bringing out the truth will lead to change. I don't know what it will take to end the war, never mind create an equitable society."

The sandwiches were put on the counter. Benjamin went to get them. He made two trips to bring all three to the table.

Elaine was still sniffling. Donna bit her sandwich.

"You weren't kidding. Wow, that really is a good sandwich."

Benjamin just smiled and took a bite of his sandwich. Elaine drank some of her soda.

"Elaine, you have to try your sandwich, it is delicious," said Donna, before she had some more of her sandwich.

"I don't think I can eat right now."

Donna said, "You don't have to carry the world on your shoulders. You're not fasting in protest, are you?" She ate some more of her sandwich.

"No, I just can't eat."

Benjamin said, "Don't worry about it. I'm sure they'll wrap it to go. You can eat it later if you regain your appetite."

Elaine said, "What makes matters worse is that I admire the socialist goals of SDS, but I've fallen in love with a guy who is all for capitalism. He's even been a counter-demonstrator at SDS protests. Nothing in my life is right anymore."

Donna said, "It's not as bad as all that. You must have had some idea that you had a conflict of values before tonight. It sounds like he just isn't the right guy for you. You can't always trust your emotions. As far as the school is concerned, the purpose of SDS is to make change happen. You are doing something by joining with them."

"It just feels so right when Jack and I are together, even though we don't agree on everything."

Donna said, "I think you should focus on your education and establishing a career. That will lead to a happy, free life for you."

They didn't say anything more. Benjamin finished his sandwich and took Elaine's up to the counter to be wrapped. Elaine and Donna bundled up again for the walk back to the campus. Benjamin accompanied Elaine and Donna to the entrance to the Barnard campus.