Poetry [Completed]

Weak

(This one was written last year when I was really depressed)

I am a weak person.

My emotions are on display with every stroke of my pen. Yet I ,some how, know how to keep them pent in.

Pent up inside my mind behind a convincing smile, while in secret my pen will write for miles.

Though I want to let my emotions go out into the wild I can't because I know I'll have to lose my smile.

My smile that is only genuine in the presence of the people who make me feel loved is always on my face.

"Why don't you contact someone?"

Because if I contact someone then this will all be too real. I can't come to realize how I feel.

If I keep silent then this will all be a dream. I'll wake up and everything will be peaches and cream.

"Take out your headphones!"

The sound that comes through those headphones help me feel sane.

"Stop listening to nonsense!"

Its nonsense to you because its in another language but I'm fluent in it and that language is pain.

"You're being dramatic!"

Maybe I am. But you aren't experiencing what I go through. I go through hate and venom and punches and bruises.

"I don't see any wounds!"

It's because of long sleeves and emotional screens.

"Who's hurting you then?"

It's my own mind that constantly tries to kill me. It calls me worthless and hopeless and that I'll never find love.

Even if i do they'll never love me back.

Honestly I believe my mind tells the truth.

I constantly think about how easy it would be too take too many pills or fall down the stairs.

But I don't do it.

Apparently people need me and care about me.

Maybe I shouldn't be writing this down. Who cares?

No one will take it seriously.

I'm Cora.

I'm always "happy".

Was very cringey and angsty. I've gotten a lot better now and I have more self confidence. Like I said this was written a while ago when I was really depressed.~Cora💜