The Crying Game

Chapter Twenty

"Did you think that I did before?" I asked, wondering.

"I wanted you to," he admitted, "but it was too late for me to realize it. I should've fought harder."

"Why didn't you?" I asked, curious about how we ended up here when I knew I tried so hard.

"Because I was afraid Brandon," he replied with a shrug of his shoulders, his tone sounding annoyed, "I didn't want anyone to know that I was falling in love with you because I was afraid to lose you, and now that I did, I could care less what anyone thinks."

"I know you don't want to hear this, Tyler, but, I learned from this." He looked back at me, "I learned that being loved by someone doesn't mean being hurt by someone. What we had wasn't healthy, and it took me forever to realize that."

"I know."

"But I don't blame you anymore, Tyler." I walked closer. "I want to thank you for giving me the moments that I do cherish. Comforting me when I needed you the most, loving me even though I knew you couldn't say it, making me feel special when I didn't feel like it."

"I wish I could change this." He said with sincerity, "I know what this is Brandon, you're saying goodbye, and I get the feeling that this may just be the last time I may see you. I'm not okay with that, but I need to accept that."

I've never seen Tyler show emotions. His voice was shaky, and a tear trickled down his cheek -his eyes were watery, turning red as he wiped his cheek with his palm.

"I just want you to know that I love you, and I will always love you." He wiped the tear from my cheek, one I didn't realize was falling, "I know he will take care of you – I know that he will give you everything that I couldn't. I know that he'll cherish you like I couldn't."

"We can't go here, Tyler." I turned, trying to hide from falling apart. "I can't... I won't... I'm not going to feel like this anymore. I still care for you, and I think I always will. I want to leave here knowing that you're going to be okay."

"Hey, hey now," He pulled me into his arms. "I know Paul is not going to like me touching you, but I need you to know that I'll get through this. It's going to be hard at first, but I'll manage."

"I love you, Tyler." I don't know why I said it, but it was the truth.

It wasn't the same love I felt for Paul, but it was enough to know that I still care for him.

"I love you too." He held onto me tighter before letting go and looking into my eyes. "Take care of yourself."

"You're leaving now?" I asked.

"If I don't go now Brandon, I'll never leave." He admitted, still in a shaky tone. "I need to let you live your life, and I need to go live mine."

"I'm going to miss you," I admitted.

"I know." He forced a smile, "but maybe someday we can meet again when we're both in better places in our lives. Maybe someday I'll come back and be able to see you without feeling like I'm going to fall apart."

"Maybe," I muttered.

"Take care." He pulled away slowly before turning without saying another word.

I watched as he phased into his wolf, leaving in the opposite direction without looking back.

I stood motionless, refusing to let myself fall apart. I wiped my tears as I could hear a painful howl in the distance, reminding me that my best friend just walked out of my life.

"You okay?" I could feel a warm hand on my lower back.

Rather than responding, I found myself wrapping my arms around Paul, burying my face into his chest as I let the tears fall. He said nothing but pulled me closer, his hand rubbing my head while he held onto me tight.