Painting Life

T w e l v e.

<< Suddenly, I wasn't so afraid of the fire between us. I wanted to cross it >>

Twelve | Fierce Determination. 

D a n i y a: 

It was another day of school but I didn't want it to be typical. 

Today, I wouldn't be terror-stricken by their awful remarks. Today, it wouldn't matter. Why should it, when I don't matter to them either?

I wanted to be different.

I was going to appear at the surface.

I walked in the hallways, composing myself. The similar feeling of fear nagged at me and my mind started filling with the thousands of what ifs I could come up with. 

Take a deep breathe, Daniya. 

Slowly. 

In. 

Out.

In. 

Out. 

It would be fine. 

My face was expressionless. I wouldn't show them was what happening inside my heart. I was a sea of emotions but I would show none. 

It was my first baby step towards not caring. I couldn't stop caring all at once. Not with the emotions resurfacing every time I tried to make them sink. They were floating on the top. 

Emma, I and another guy were the only person in the hall way. Emma acknowledged me with a small smile and a wave. Somehow, that made me feel worse. 

She had never known me before. Why would she now? 

It was all because of Haris. I hated him for making every one fall in love with him so fast. I hated him because I wanted what he had. 

The charm, the personality...the kindness. 

I hated it because even I was falling for his good traits and even I wanted to talk to him and see why people loved him so much. 

I hated all of it. 

Emma left. It was only I and the other guy in the hallway. He smirked at me and showed me his middle finger. I didn't know what it stood for but I knew by now, it must have been bad. 

I held my nose up.

"Bich." He whispered in my ear as he passed me and I made an attempt to shove him but he dodged and sauntered away. I breathed deeply. 

Don't let this upset you, Daniya. 

Breathe.

In. 

Out.

I cared. No matter how much I tried to stop it, stop the wetness in my eyes, I failed. Because I cared. Even though I didn't want to.   

:::

"So, how was your day at school?" Haris asked me conversationally as we both waited for Mommy to bring out our lunch to the table. 

Stop doing that. I wanted to scream. Stop being so nice. 

"Okay." I said, smothering back my feelings. I just really wanted to cry. 

Haris nodded and didn't press further. 

My feelings were went over board then as they gripped the sides of my ship because it was sinking. There was half part of me that wanted Haris to be concerned, to care about me. But then there was the other who was grateful that he wasn't worried. 

My ship was toppling but the grateful part was anchoring it. I was safe...for now. 

"So," Mommy said chirpily, unaware of my inner war. "How was your day at school, sweethearts?" 

"Pretty good," Haris answered. "Emma invited me to part take in the annual art competition and I really want to." 

"Then you should!" Mommy replied. "I've seen your drawings. They were amazing." 

She forgot about my day, I thought bitterly. 

"Were?" He teased her lightly. "I am wounded." 

It scared me how well they got along. I was afraid that Haris would steal my mother from me. In fact, I was sure of it. 

:::

"Daddy?" I popped my head in my parents' room. 

"Come in, Daniya!" My mother exclaimed. "We were just planning out your birthday." 

I was surprised she even remembered it. 

"I want to talk to Daddy alone," I said pointedly. 

"Oh," She said looking disappointed and I hated myself for causing it. "Okay."

Daddy came out of the room, and took my to the balcony, pulling out a chair. It was the best place for our quality father-daughter time. I loved it. 

"Is there something wrong, baby girl?" He asked me sweetly. 

"Haris is taking Mommy away." I replied. 

"Literally?" He asked, alarmed. 

"No," I let out a mirthless laugh. "But he might as well. He's winning over her heart. They get along too well." 

Daddy ruffled my hair and sighed, "Baby girl, if he were stealing away your mother, would she be planning your birthday?" 

I shook my head, feeling a little better.

"See?" Daddy smiled. "Mommy won't go anywhere." 

I nodded, biting my lips to hold back a smile. I wanted him to say more. Re-assure me more. 

He seemed to understand because he pulled me in a hug. I rested my head against his chest, calmed by his breathing. He was alive and here and he meant the world to me. 

Somehow, only that mattered. 

End Of Part One. 

A little bonus excerpt from the time between part one and part two: 

"Haris?" I asked. 

"Yeah?" 

"Why don't you tell Mommy about my secret?" 

"Do you want me to?" He asked. 

"No." 

He smiled, "That's exactly why." 

And in that moment, I wondered what I would do without him and his endless smiles. 

The end of part one :'( Oh, well. Part Two awaits! :D Part two is in the same book if you are wondering. It's a single novel, divided in to parts. 

Anyways! Just EIGHT WORDS AWAY FROM 15K. OMG. *dies* *resurrects*

HELP ME. 

Anyways, happy reading ;)