Welcome to Hell💖

Gabba the Goat

When I was in the fourth grade(soo about 6 years ago?) I was in this thing called 4-H. It's kinda like a agriculture club? But you can do lots of different activities such as Photography, Food and Nutrition(cooking/baking), Taking care of animals like cows, pigs, rabbits, goats, the whole 9 yards. And you go to competitions with your activity. It's pretty cool but I don't do it anymore.

My aunt lived out in the farming communities at the time, and she made her kids raise goats for 4-H. My mom, being her sister, decided that we should as well since we were living with them.

I remember all of us having to pile into the truck and drive for hours, just for us to buy two goats. It sucked.

On the way there though, I was brainstorming names for my goat with my cousin Brandon. (He's one year older than me, just so ya know) I wanted a girl goat, and I loved the name Gabby. I told Brandon my idea for her name.

"But Megan, you can only show boy goats!" Brandon said to me.

My face was squished with confusion, "Why?"

"Momma says its so that our boy goats don't make babies with girl goats."

I 'ohhhh'ed, "That makes sense... But what am I supposed to name my goat?!"

Gabby was the only name I'd thought of. Then I remembered a show that I enjoyed watching, Yo Gabba Gabba. Gabba's close enough to Gabby, right?

So that's how I chose the name Gabba for my goat.

We showed up the goat place(I have no clue what it was called, that was a long time ago!) and I saw this adorable, tiny goat all the way in the back of the pen. It was the smallest one, but also the fastest. When I told my mom that that was the one that I wanted she told the goat seller man, and he said we just needed to catch him.

Catch him? I thought, Piece of cake.

I was wrong.

"WILL YOU JUST STAND STILL FOR THREE GODDAMN SECONDS!?" My mom screamed at the tiny goat.

Gabba was running around bleating like a madman, his response to my mother was, "mmMMHAAAAAAA"
(Is that understandable? Lol he was crazy.)

We had FINALLY gotten him in the cage and into the back of the truck.

Faith's goat was a fat and mellow character. He was, essentially, the exact opposite of Gabba. Faith decided on the name Twister for him, even though he was a surprisingly calm goat. Twister had gone into the cage almost willingly. I mean we did bribe him with a bit of alfalfa, but c'mon. Compared to Gabba he was a saint.

Almost a month later, it came time for the shows to start.

Showing goats is hands down one of the most boring things I have ever done. In my life. Not to mention, it's kind of terrifying. At least it was to a shy 4th grader with the attention span like a Hobbit, short.

You take your goat from its pen area on one side of the barn, and walk it all the way across to the next barn over where they have the show arenas. And then you stand there. In an arena. Trying to keep your goat from running off or eating the hay on the floor. And wait for the judges to look at each and every goat individually. Let's just say, it got boring, fast.

The worst part was trying to get Gabba to the arena. Ever heard the saying that goats are stubborn? Yeah? Well it's definitely true.😂

My poor mom would have to carry my stubborn ass goat ALL the way across two barns. And during the show, if he stopped walking? Omg I would have to drag him around, it was so embarrassing.

I was still sad to see him go, though. We didn't keep him until he died(don't worry there's no angst😂), but at the end of the showing season he had to get on this big truck with all the other goats. I honestly don't know where they went, or if he was still as stubborn where he was going as he was with me. He probably was.

Here's a picture of us:

(The blonde one is my sister Faith with her goat Twister, the other is me and Gabba.)
__________________________________________

Ha Ha so I've barely eaten anything in the past three days,, I've entered another plane of existence and have ascended into the astral realm Ha Ha

Y'all don't get to choose what I'm writing in the next chapter because it's a surprise!!
(But seriously send help I'm starving)

*wink wonk*

Later, Paladudes✌️