All You Need Is Love

Chapter 30

*Nicole's POV*

"Nicole, will you marry me?" he asks.

His words instantly cause my smile to fade and my brain to malfunction. I must've heard him wrong, right? Marry him? He can't possibly be serious, right?

"M- Marry you? Like, you want to be my husband?" I ask him in disbelief.

He laughs. "Well, yeah, that is what marriage is, isn't it?"

I take a moment to gather my thoughts and pull myself together. I already know the answer I want to give him, but there's no easy way to say it. "I- Michael, I can't marry you." I say hesitantly, feeling my heart break with each syllable.

His gorgeous smile instantly fades from his face, as if he was sure that I would say yes. "W-Why not?" he asks in a shallow, shaky tone.

"We've been together six months and you want me to give up everything and-" he cuts me off.

"Wow, so marrying me is giving your life up then, right?" he snaps back at me.

"What? No! Michael, that's not what I meant-" he interrupts me again.

"Well, it's what you said." he retorts.

"I didn't mean it like that! You want me to marry you and there are so many things we still need to learn about each other; I haven't even met your family yet!" I say.

"Screw my family, I haven't spoken to them in years! You're the only family I have and now you don't even want to be with me?" he says, slightly raising his voice. "I should've known that you'd use me like everyone else always has!"

"That's not what I fucking said!" I yell back at him while standing up from the bed only to feel myself be yanked down again by my arm.

"Hey!" he yells. "Don't use that language with me, girl."

His words combined with the audacity he has to believe that he can control me angers me even more, causing me to want to provoke him on purpose."You're not my fucking Dad, Michael, I'll say whatever the fuck I want to you whenever the fuck I want to."

I watch as he swiftly holds his hand up and propels it towards me before stopping himself.

I quickly throw my arms up in defense.

He was about to hit me.

Just like my father always has.

He's no different from him.

A look of regret instantly washes over his face "Oh my God, baby, I'm so sorry." he says while moving closer to me and taking my face in his hands. "I don't know what came over me. I didn't mean it, I swear to God I didn't  mean it."

I quickly push him off of me. "Get the hell away from me." I say.

"Baby, please-" I interrupt him.

"No!" I scream. And in that moment, I decide within myself that I need to hurt him.

I need to hurt him more than he hurt me right now, because when someone hurts your soul, it's so much worse than physical pain.

"I wish I'd never met you!" I yell in his face. "I regret you being my first everything, you know why? Because you're an asshole! I will never forgive you for this and after I gather all my shit up you're never going to see me again."I say before making my way to the living room to storm out of the front door to stop myself from killing him.

"Please don't leave, baby, I'm sorry!" he says while following close behind me.

I snap my head around to look at him. "That's what my Father always says, but then he just does it again and again! What if you don't stop yourself next time? I never would've dreamed that you were like him, that's why I loved you!" I say with tears pouring out of my eyes.

He looks at me in shock. "Loved?" he asks me.

"Yeah." I say. "Loved." I reach for the doorknob and slowly open it.

"Where are you going?" he asks me.

"For a walk." I say while stepping out the door. I quickly turn to tell him the one last thing on my mind before taking off. "My Dad was right about you, you know? You are ugly, but not on the outside; just on the inside."

I could tell my words hurt him immensely just based on the expression his face possessed, but he tried to hold back his sadness from being exposed to me.

"Please, don't go." he says. "It's pouring rain and you'll catch a cold. Just stay here and we can talk about things-"

"No, Michael! What you did tonight- I don't think I can forgive you. Actually, no you'd have to be dying for me to forgive you." I say, slightly regretting the harshness of my words.

He doesn't say anything as I turn to walk out the door and slam it behind me.

And I stood there just for a moment.

Hoping that he'd follow me.

Hoping that he'd fight for me; for us.

But he didn't.

"Maybe he never loved me." I think to myself as I slowly walk down the hallway and into the elevator with a heart full of regret for every emotional trauma I've put everyone through for this last six months.

And I can't help but ask myself, "Was it even worth it?"