Not an Object, Not a Weapon

Chapter 2: quivering, trembling, wobbling

"Flower," I repeat but the word feels foreign on my tongue, "not flower." Nodding at those two words helps me understand who I am. Flowers are beautiful, they move gracefully based on the direction of the wind, that is not me. Not that I have seen a mirror recently, but I can assume that my image is repulsing and the bruises are still present all over my body. "Imperfect," I say while collapsing to the ground, and a grunt escapes my lips, "worse."

"Get her out of there and back to the infirmary. She seems to be doing it again," Avarija orders before leaving Elias to deal with a messed up me,"she will sure be a piece of work that better pay off," he mutters once he is out of the room, but like I said, heightened hearing.

"Are you alright." My mouth stays shut as I stare at him with wonder. He seems to be concerned with that I have to say but I don't believe it, for my life, I can't, "hey, can you answer me?" his words  go through me, have I been truly able to answer anyone? "Even a word is fine. I seem to like your riddles."

"Not," I say back immediately, "not ri- rid- riddles."

"I apologize," he says softly while placing his right hand on my corresponding shoulder, "being new here is rough. Everyone is a mess in their own way." I raise my eyebrow at him and he chuckles in response, "it is true. I would like to think that I've been this cool and collective the whole time, but saying that would be a complete lie. I fought, everyone, everything, basically any object that I thought was threatening. They had to knock me out multiple times to stop me from harming anyone permanently. But I have come a long way since then I would like to think." We both share a laugh, "you should smile more often." My hands immediately touch my face to realize that I had, indeed, been smiling. "Now, let's get you standing."

"Want," I shake my head still trying to figure out what to say, "no?"

"I think you said those two words out of order, not that that would fix your grammar or anything. But we don't have a choice. Avarija controls us all, so if he says that you need to be at the infirmary, then that is what we should do."

"Vile,"  I say in disgust.

"Be careful what you say! He has cameras everywhere."

"Crazy,  remember?" I can feel the lightness in my face, another foreign concept, my eyes seem to be dancing with his, "serious not." I cross my arms, "wicked."

"You know, for someone who doesn't like to talk much, you sure are sassy." I scrunch up my face and he laughs again, it sounds like a smooth melody that I cannot get enough of. His hands reach for mine, and my hands fit easily in his large hands. Taking a few steps back, he gets me standing.

"Woah dude, who is that?" a guy asks as we pass him in some hallway.

"New recruit, and back off," Elias warns.

"No need to be hostile, it would be a selfish thing not to share," he says, "hi I am Seathan." He holds his hand out to shake to which I return, "and you are..."

I look to Elias for help but he looks back at me confused, useless.  I try to search my brain for the right words, "name," I say. Scrunching my face up to think, which is a nasty habit, "don't," I say trying to place the last word just right, "know."

"Wow, you must really be new, usually our name is the first thing we are told."

"Complicated," I tell him truthfully, but of course to him, my silence means something else, and I am trying to figure out what.

"Intrigued," he smiles and bends down so we can be eye level, "until we meet again, puella." he says before walking off.

"Puella?" I turn to Elias who stands there with a red face.