The Beast Within | Vampire Knight

8- Evocation Of The Past

I ambled outside immediately falling onto the grass that was acting as a mattress for the meantime, my eyes lingered towards the sun to see if I'd really turn blind by staring at it for too long before I outstretched my arm reaching for the sun as if I could hold it with the tip of my fingers. I always wondered when the Earth would finally give up at protecting humanity and let the sun's heat wave burn us to crisps. It's not like we could avoid getting burnt alive. It was destined for us to perish to the grounds paying for the sins we've committed, the crimes we do everyday, the deaths we caused and will continue to cause.

"Death is inevitable." I murmur. "One minute we're born." I stare at the flower that just blossomed. "The next minute we die." My eyes follow towards the hoary flower that toppled over to it's downfall.

"You're an idiot, you know that right?" He laughs shaking his head.

We were on the fields a few minutes away from our homes, he claimed that I needed exercise to which I ended up throwing my Starbucks coffee all over him. He was lucky my coffee was cold, otherwise we would have a pleasant trip to the ER.

We would do this every Saturday, whether it'd be a picnic, swimming, Gym, library. We would go everywhere together, and it's always been like that. So this time, we were jump skipping in the fields and also brought a few sandwiches and drinks to munch on after we were exhausted. And I, being the moron I am ended up getting tangled with the jump rope that was holding me hostage.

"Shut up and get me out of this stupid." I whine stomping my feet onto the ground.

He laughs even louder to the point where there were tears streaming down his cheek making me roll my eyes and glare at him, once he was done with his laughing fit he finally decides to help me untangle myself out of this mess.

Obviously, since the universe couldn't allow me to not embarrass myself for once I ended tripping over the skipping rope and into yet another tangled mess. But this time my legs were on either side as I straddled him, his arms radiated warmth and a familiarity of what home feels like as they wrapped firmly around my waist, and my hands were barricading the side of his face making me look directly into his golden eyes I know and love.

The moment was perfect, yet it couldn't last forever.

Our nose were touching side by side, my eyes involuntarily travelled to his round, red plumped lips that taunted me from a close distance just to press my lips against his.

So that's what I did.

Instantly our eyes closed, hands tangled in each other's hair, lips battling against each other like we were having one of our usual competitions yet this time it was different. I knew it was different, when I felt the sudden urge to stick my tongue into his mouth, our tongue's battled for dominance which unfortunately I didn't win. But I was fine with that, I was totally fine with it.

Tales about how fireworks set off, how an electric current runs through your veins as the adrenaline swirls around your body, it was true. They weren't fibs, they were the truth. I've never felt something so close to being wanted before, to have someone touching me in ways that I wanted more of it, to be loved for the first time in my life.

We separated, both panting heavily as hunger strives through our eyes, a lustful hunger.  My face lit up when a certain smile appeared on his lips, lips that I so mercilessly devoured like some sort of wild animal. It was the happiest moment of my life, nothing ever made me feel like this before, and I wanted to feel like that everyday.

"Wow, shortie. If I knew you were such a good kisser I would've done that ages ago." He grins pulling me closer as if a second later I would disappear as a fragment of his imagination. The look in his eyes, it was like he couldn't believe that it happened as well. I didn't even know I had it in me to make the first move. But boy, I'm hella glad I did.

"Five foot seven isn't that short." I mumble into his shoulder, my head lying sideways on his chest as I listened to his heartbeat. A beat that was wildly drumming like crazy.

"You're shorter than me meaning that you are rendered as a midget in my eyes. My stupid midget." I rolled my eyes, even at a time like this he somehow managed to shove in an insult.

But I couldn't help that little flutter in my chest when he said 'My'.

I'm his stupid midget.

And I would rather not be with anyone else, but him.

I squeeze my eyes closed watching as the droplets of rain splash against my skin, interlacing with the salty stream of tears rushing down like a waterfall down my cheek. I clench the knife in my hand before holding the fist to my chest, letting out a sob. Why? Why did things have to be this way? Maybe if my existence was hypothetical there might of been a chance for him to live the life that he deserved, and a life that was selfishly given me for whatever vacuous, inscrutable reason.

I could just end it all now, the pain, the suffering, the immense guilt on my shoulders burdening the lives that were lost for the sake of someone who wasn't worth the generosity. But then that would put their sacrifices in vain, and the last thing I want is for their deaths to be nugatory.

"Why am I such a fucking mistake? God certainly fucked up at creating me, goddamnit now I'm talking to myself." I chuckle at myself before shaking my head at my stupidity.

"I should probably get back inside, don't want my non-existent dick to be cut off now would I?" I sigh pushing myself up from the ground, stumbling a few steps backwards at the heaviness from my drenched clothing pulled me to the ground, as if it wanted me to become one with it.

"Not now Momma nature, still got a long way to go." I look back up at the sky, as if I could see his golden orbs staring right down at me.

"I'll return soon, I promise Archer." I smile back up at the grey clouds before messily wiping my face with my sleeves to make it look like I wasn't sobbing my heart out. Don't need people thinking I've gone weak now do I?

I tug my hood over tightly, trying to shelter my face from getting wet before I ran back to the dorms knowing that I probably would get attacked by a crazed Rose who would start giving me lectures about listening to her when she says to stay put while she goes for a whole thirty minutes without returning. Do I look like a dog to you?

I opened the door to the dorm cursing in annoyance when the door wouldn't budge, I ran towards the door pushing it open with my shoulder before gaping at the murder scene before me.

"Oh fucking hell." I ran my fingers over my face. "When do I ever get a break?"

-*-

A/N:

Hm... so what do you think she saw?

QOTC: House number? (Dw cba to stalk ya'll)