Twenty-Five••Concealing Lies With Lies

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Valnia's return to the Monster Lair was quick and uneventful. Alone, stuck in silence, she allowed herself to become filled with regret. With disappointment. Each moment away from her sister made her stomach churn as she realized what she'd done.

She said too much and yet left Melaynia with too many questions. More than before.

She hates me... and will be more tempted by true rebellion.

Shivering, Valnia sensed the lies eating her on the inside. The lies she should have told Melaynia instead of getting too tangled up and spitting out the truth. The lies she'd sworn herself to tell, to protect her sister. To protect the Monsters.

But now she'd exposed both. By revealing a little too much to her sibling, she'd put the Monsters in a little too much danger of losing yet another recruit.

While she descended the steps to the Underground entrance, sweat beaded up under her mask. She'd had to punish Melaynia, yes; but it wasn't her right to tell her about it all.

Twitching in terror, she almost missed a step and caught her breath to steady her queasiness.

What had she done? Spouted out some semi-truth that would jeopardize the Monster's missions and throw Melaynia onto the wrong path?

I've complicated matters further.

Barely acknowledging the guards standing by as she entered the Lift, she shuddered. As the machine whirled to life and lowered her into the Lair, her regret turned to despair. Sorrow. She missed her sister and wished to go straight to her quarters to avoid her feelings for as long as she could.

Disregarding the usual disdain thrown at her from recruits and Attendants, she rushed through the halls without stopping until she reached her chambers. She should have touched base with Lexa, or let Wylan know she was back... but they'd have to wait. She needed time.

HQ keeps track of us... they'll learn I'm home.

After slamming her door, she sank into her bed. She'd abandoned her sister... Melaynia wasn't a recruit, she was Melaynia.

"I've doomed her..." She heaved as she tried to hold in her sobs. "Let everyone down... half-assed my duties... put everybody in peril." She sniffled and her cheeks spasmed as a few tears slipped out. "Mel... will betray us... that'll weaken the Monsters... weaken us all."

Why hadn't she stuck to the plan? Why did she risk getting locked up by attempting to warn Melaynia?

I'm screwed.

She'd been so strong for so long. Even when shamed by the Monsters, when her relationship went from rumor to reality... she hadn't broken down. But today, her feeble facade crumbled. The soldier she was trained to be had disappeared, leaving place to the shy, defeated eighteen-year-old that she thought she'd left above ground after her Sacrifice.

Since Melaynia's arrival, Valnia had become so busy watching out for her and investigating her motives, that she lost sight of who she became. What she was fighting for. She neglected the duties she'd inadvertently signed up for. And instead of dealing with the feelings her sister woke in her, she... sent her off. Far away. To test her, torment her, trick her.

Is that what the old me would have done?

She hiccuped.

"I should have never... let her... come. Stopped the crystals..." She choked on the sobs spewing from her mouth, no longer able to prevent them.

No one could alter the crystals' decisions, no one could contest destiny... but she hadn't even tried. Too excited to see her sister again, too eager to welcome her to the secret program... she'd done nothing.

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