Nicholas Grey Must Not Die | ✓

8 | Lethal

"I heard you got arrested," I quickly said, pointlessly trying to defend myself.

He didn't hold back the dead look in his eyes as he said, "Two weeks ago. It's been two weeks, Iris."

I shook my head fast. "I know and I'm sorry for that, too. I should've come sooner. I should've visited you in jail. I regret that so much."

Nothing about his stance changed at my words. Rather, he gave me a nonchalant shrug. "I don't."

My eyebrows furrowed. "Nick. Please let me speak," my voice broke towards the end as I began to recognize the damage I'd done.

He wasn't fazed by it though. "Iris, I'm tired. The world is trying to take me out and I need to be ready to fight. My siblings need me. My dad needs me. My mom needs me. I don't have time to waste on trying to convince you that I'm innocent in all of this. So if you can just let go of me and see yourself out, I would more than appreciate it." His words were laced with a lethal venom. He grabbed both of my forearms and pulled them away from his body, using them as leverage to push me away.

I felt lightheaded. Oh, my God, I was losing it. I could feel my already frail grip on my sanity slipping.

So when his words fully dawned on me, I saw red. I was angry...at myself. I let this go on too long. How could I have done to him what I spent all these years chiding him for doing to me?

Only, it was he who suffered the ramifications of my anger. I pushed him hard and he stumbled back a few steps into his home. Before he could recover, I shoved him again. "I do believe you!" I cried, my voice aching as I screamed the words at the top of my lungs. Tears poured out of my eyes like a waterfall and I didn't have the energy to build a dam to stop them. "I believe you. I was wrong to run out on you like that, but I was so confused. It had been three years since we'd had a conversation; I didn't know if I could really trust you. But I know differently now. I know you didn't do it, Nick,  I know it a hundred percent. And I'm so sorry I doubted you. I'm sorry I ran away when you needed me the most. I'm sorry it took me two damn weeks to tell you this. I'm sorry I wasn't there to be your rock. I'm just...I'm so sorry."

He kept staring at me. He wasn't blinking. His empty face hasn't changed one bit. 

So, I continued, because I didn't know what else to do. I took in a deep breath, willing the tears to slow down. My voice was calmer, quieter, but it trembled under the weight of my emotions. "I've been hearing what everyone is saying about you, so I'm sure you've heard some of it as well. I want you to know that I support you. I will be by your side through it all. I will defend you to the best of my abilities. I got your back no matter what, even if you don't want me in your life. I will do whatever it takes to make sure you don't go down for something you didn't do. I'll make you three promises, Nicholas. 

One, I promise to never run out on you again, even if things get rough. Two, I promise to always defend your honor, your family's name. Three, I promise to stand by your side through all of the hell you'll be put through. I promise I'll make this better," I finished off. I hadn't consulted myself on the promises I was making; the words simply slipped out. However, I realized how much I actually meant my promises as I was saying them. 

The girls trust me. They trust me enough to tell me their dark secrets, to confide in me the terrible things they've done. I needed to come up with a plan to use that to my advantage. There had to be a way to catch them admitting to Nick's innocence. I will get those confessions if it's the last thing I do. 

And that's a promise I'll make to myself. 

After a long minute of dead silence, he let out a loud sigh. I tore my attention from my thoughts and refocused on his eyes. Finally, he was tearing down the walls he'd put up against me. Mixed with the tiredness in his eyes was a sort of devastation and sadness that tore open my heart.  He looked like he was in so much pain, not the kind you can take a couple of Advils to rid of, but the one that tears down your emotional and mental strength until you're nothing but a shellless being who has lost themselves. I started panicking at the sight, but before I could voice my worries, he spoke. "You believe me?" 

He sounded so weak, so unlike anything I've ever heard from him. I nodded fast, trying to reassure him. "One-hundred and ten percent."

He gulped, tears welling in his eyes. "Why?" He asked, his voice breaking.

I took a moment to gather my emotions. I needed to stay strong for him. I had to; I can't cry right now. So, I forced the tears away and looked at him with certainty. I knew I couldn't tell him about why I really changed my mind, because I needed to keep that a secret in order to get the girls' confession. If he knew, he might try to rush things and I needed to be patient for this to work. Thus, I told him the partial truth. "Because I remember who you are, Nick. You are a great guy. You're honest. You're kind. Even with those three years missing, I know you're one of the most honorable persons I know. Everything you've done for the school, for this small town, you've done out of the kindness of your heart. Even when you were struggling with all that was going on in your family, you made sure to get perfect grades, to win all those games, to volunteer all over town...you got the school's name out there, Nick. People come from other states to see you play; you're incredible. And everyone who turned their back on you when you needed them most can go screw themselves with a damn cactus. They don't deserve you. I'm sorry it took me so long to remember this. Plus I know when you're lying to me. Three years aren't enough to completely change a person. Your eyes always give you away when you lie. You were honest with me. You didn't do this, Nick. I know you didn't."

As I spoke, his tears fell. He was breaking down before me and I feared I wouldn't be able to handle it. Not caring that he might push me away, I pulled him into a comforting hug. I wove my fingers through his soft hair as a violent sob tore through him. Tears welled in my eyes at the pain that radiated off of him. The sobs that escaped him sounded so agonized, so tortured, that I almost started bawling myself, but I needed to stay strong for him. 

Moments later, he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me against him tightly, almost as if I was his lifeline. He buried his face in the nape of the neck and let it all out, finally giving in to all the emotions that threatened to wreck him. His body shook against mine, trembling as all f his emotions hit him at once. I held him tighter in response, trying to let him know that everything will be okay, that I will always be here for him.

I ran my fingers through his hair over and over again, trying to provide him some comfort as he found a way to deal with all the torture everyone he trusted had dealt him.

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