Love Grown Cold

Is This Madness?

Natasha woke the next morning to the sound of the shower running. She yawned and sat up, running a hand through her messy red hair. She quickly got dressed and was brushing her hair when the Soldier walked out of the bathroom. He was wearing black sweatpants and no shirt and was currently rubbing his hair dry with a towel.

"Morning," he said quietly.

"Mornin'," Natasha replied slowly, eyeing him. She told herself that she was just checking to make sure that his wound was doing all right, but her eyes lingered a little too long.

He smirked lightly at her. "Everything look ok?"

She didn't respond, just walked over and placed a hand where the bullet hole had been the night before. Natasha glanced up at him. "Where did the wound go?"

The Soldier shrugged. "I dunno. That's just kinda what happens with me. I heal really fast."

Natasha nodded. "Some kind of super soldier serum?"

"How would I know? It's not like I would be able to remember."

Natasha nodded. "Ok, just curious. I'm going to take a shower and then we really need to get out of here."

The Soldier nodded. "Sure, take your time."

In twenty minutes the two of them were on the road again, with Natasha driving and the Soldier looking terrified in the passenger seat.

"Natasha, that was a stop sign!"

"So? There wasn't anyone coming."

"That doesn't mean that you can just run it! You have to respect the law!"

That last comment sent Natasha into giggles, something she couldn't ever remember doing. "Respect the law? Soldier Boy, we're assassins. Our entire job is against the law."

The Soldier gave her a friendly glare. "Is being assassins was against our choice. But what we can control, we should."

Natasha nodded thoughtfully as she sped through a town, completely ignoring any and all warning signs.

"Natasha! You're going way too fast!"

"Says who?"

"Says every single speed limit sign I've seen!"

Natasha grinned. "Would you like to drive?"

"Yes! Please! I don't think I can take much more of this."

Natasha laughed as they switched seats. "The world's foremost assassin, and you're a backseat driver."

"I am not!" The Soldier protested as he drove quietly down the street. "I just don't like it when people blatantly disobey the law."

"Well that's certainly not something you learned from HYDRA."

The Soldier shook his head. "No. I think it must be the remnants of who I was before."

Natasha smiled. "Who do you think you were before?"

The Soldier smiled wistfully. "Someone a lot different. I have dreams similar to yours sometimes, though not often enough for my liking. In them, I have a best friend I've always protected and who will always have my back."

Natasha closed her eyes, trying to imagine what that would be like. Surprisingly, she was able to come up with a pretty good idea of what it was like.

"And then, there's this girl in them." Natasha's eyes snapped open.

"A girl?"

The Soldier nodded, eyeing her. "She actually looks a lot like you. Red hair, very mischievous."

Natasha smirked and slapped at his arm.

"But dreams with her are pretty fleeting. If she was someone important to me, they wiped her pretty cleanly from my mind."

Natasha nodded sadly. "That's what they do. They take everything you love and throw it away. But even so, I'm really hoping that someday I'll find out who I was before."

"Start over?"

"I don't know." Natasha ran a hand through her hair, a nervous gesture. She was surprised that the Soldier could get such a good reading on her. "I want too, but I just wonder if I haven't done too much to be able to start again."

The Soldier shrugged. "Never know until you try."

Natasha sighed. "But until we do figure it out, we need to focus on staying alive."

The Soldier smirked. "My favorite activity."

She turned towards him and raised an eyebrow. "I'm surprised they didn't wipe the snarkiness right out of you."

He chuckled. "Oh they tried. But that can only last for so long. Natural snark and all that. Why do you think the make me wear the mask?"

Natasha laughed, well and truly laughed. She was surprised how easily it was to laugh with this man, to be close to him. It made her wonder...

"What about you?" The Soldier asked.

"What about me?"

"How did they let such a top notch assassin become such a lousy driver?"

"Oh you!" Natasha teased, shoving him playfully, briefly noticing how solid his arm was beneath the uniform. "For your information, I am a very good driver."

"If today's any example of your "good driving", then I fear for the lives of everyone on the road."

Natasha laughed again. "Keep making these comments and it might be your life that's in danger.

He pretended to be offended. "Well! In that case..." he trailed off.

Natasha waited expectantly. "In that case what?"

"In that case..." The Soldier cleared his throat dramatically. "I won't make you dinner when we get back."

"Oh, you won't?" Natasha smirked. "Didn't know you could cook."

He smirked back. "Never said I couldn't."

"Well then," Natasha said, becoming more curious about this man. "You'll have to cook tonight to prove that I am wrong!"

He smiled at her. "I might just do that."

"You better." She grinned. She couldn't remember when she'd had this much fun. Of course, her memory was pretty patchy. But still, it was amazing. It felt like she had known the Soldier her whole life, instead of a few days.

All too soon they made it back to their apartment. Though, it could've been just in time, as the two of them were laughing so hard they were having a hard time breathing.

"We're going to have to think of something serious or they're going to get suspicious." Natasha warned the Soldier, still bursting into helpless giggles now and then.

"Aw man." He said, snapping his fingers. "And here I was going to stand on my head and say the alphabet backwards!" That only sent them into more giggles, imagining the world's foremost assassin standing on his head like a teenager.

Luckily for them, there wasn't anyone waiting in their apartment.

"I'd better start dinner." The Soldier said, making his way to the kitchen.

Natasha smiled. "You do that." She turned to watch a little tv, but the Soldier caught her arm.

"I just wanted to say... thank you for today. I haven't laughed that hard in who knows how long."

Natasha smiled again and, almost unintentionally, pulled him in for a quick hug. He barely stiffened before hugging her back. It felt... natural. It was almost odd, but at the same time, a nice moment for both of them.

"I had a good time today too." Natasha said pulling away.

The Soldier grinned and ruffled her hair. "We'd better come up with a good explanation for why it took nine hours to go a normally four hour trip."

Natasha smirked. "I'll think of something."