Over Again ( A Kian Lawley / O2L )

Chapter 36 - Explanation

"Because, I-I." She keeps stuttering, not finishing sentences. There is a long pause and I nearly speak up, but right before I open my mouth, she begins to speak. "I was pregnant."

What does she mean 'was' pregnant?

Was?

"Was?" Kian speaks my mind. He looks as confused as I am.

"Kian, I was never pregnant with your child, but I was pregnant." She looks at Kian straight in the eye the whole time.

"What?" Kian looks at her like she's a lunatic, which I'm not sure that she isn't one.

"Kian, we had sex, but you used a condom. It was completely protected. And I knew... I knew you were too drunk to remember..." She looks away in shame. She took advantage of Kian in more ways than one and she knows it. She had sex with him when he was too drunk to know if he had a condom on or not, and she pulled this whole pregnancy game and he believed her.

How could someone do that to another person?

"But you said you were pregnant," Kian asks, reminding me that she had said that earlier.

She takes a deep breath.

"About a week or so after we had sex, I had sex with a guy named Jason. We were at a party and were both drunk. He took me home and the rest is blurry. But we weren't protected in any way." She keeps taking deep breaths as if she's trying to keep herself from hyperventilating.

I'm still astounded that she tried to pull the whole thing over on Kian, and that's why I'm taking deep, calming breaths. I haven't said a thing the entire time I've been here.

"I got pregnant," she says after a long pause. This confuses me. If what Kian tells me is right, they had sex about six months ago, so shouldn't she be pregnant?

"But you're...not pregnant," Kian points out, and her eyes lower to her hands that are placed in her lap.

Emily has done a lot of things to me. She's done a lot to Kian as well.

Emily has broken us up not once, but twice. She has cause a hell of an amount of drama between me and my friends and between me and Kian. She has tried her very damn best to keep Kian away from me, and even succeeded for it recently.

But no matter what she has done to me, she didn't deserve what she says next.

"When I was twelve weeks pregnant, I miscarried."

The breath in my throat is stuck, and all air from my lungs is gone. Her words are heartbreaking, but what really upsets me is the look of pure devastation on her features.

Her eyes are weak and completely upset, her skin shows no warmth, and the way that her mouth and cheeks curve, I can tell that no smile that has crossed her face has been a real one since it happened.

"I was terrified. I was so sad. I couldn't hardly best the emotional pain that I felt after that happened. After I had...it removed, I had to know of it was yours or Jason's. So I got a paternity test on the DNA. And I got Jason to agree to it. It wa his baby, but he didn't even are that our baby was never going to live. He didn't care that this little life that was inside of me had passed on. He didn't care!" Her voice cracks because it gets louder with anger and frustration. "I couldn't help feeling that it was my fault that the baby died. And he wasn't even there to comfort me. He left!"

Her words pull at the strings on my heart in the worst way. It breaks my heart to see her in this much pain. To know that someone would care so less for the life of an unborn child. All grudges I've held to her, all of the hatred and anger leaves me when I see how truly sad she is. I can't imagine going through anything like that.

Kian is about to speak up but Emily cuts him short by beginning to talk again. When I look at Kian, he has tears streaming down his cheeks, the same as me.

"I couldn't let go that easily though. I couldn't allow myself to give up my baby that easy. I needed a way to hang onto it just a little bit longer. And I needed someone that wasn't just going to throw me to the side that easily. I know it's insane and selfish and makes absolutely no sense. But it was the only way I could handle what was happening. I had to hold on a little longer." She stops talking, her voice choking up to were it cracks. I look over to Kian and his eyes are red and puffy, tears spilling over the edge.

"Emily, I'm so sorry," I speak to her for the first time, wiping tears away from my eyes.

She looks at me and gives a very weak smile in response.

"You're fucking insane," Kian mutters before wiping his eyes before getting up and walking out angrily.

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"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."

OKAY BE COMPLETELY HONEST

if you saw that coming before reading ANY of this update, (beginning a/n included) comment that you did. If you're completely shocked, let me know.

This was really emotional for me, so I'm sorry if I made you cry. No one should have to go through anything like that, but sadly it happens all of the time.

So yeah! There's the chapter! Tell me what you think!

Oh and can y'all check out Destruction? I hate to do this but I'm so desperate for people to read it that I'm not updating this or destruction until destruction reaches 50 votes total, so like if all of you go read all 4 chapters and vote on all of them, you'll get an update super duper quick!

love you thank y'all for reading!

xox -Delilah