Oh Honey,
Sorry I haven't updated you in a while. It's been a few days since those texts with Tyler, which means i have seen him about 17 times since then. I would be lying if i said it wasn't the most awkward encounters of my whole life. They just really were.
The first one, the morning after Brian had stayed over, was really bad because it was fresh after the beef, right? Fresh beef. I mean i'm a vegetarian so i don't know much about the cooking of beef but i knew this one was well done and ready to come out of the oven.
Brian got dressed at my house and we left for filming together. This must've made crazy Tyler mad because he was staring us down while we dragged up and he was watching us talk and was just being really weird. See, the beef is too much for even the beef maker to handle.
This morning, Brian went over to him which left me to stand awkwardly by myself before we filmed. I tried not to watch because i didn't want Tyler to think i was some weirdo stalker who wanted to cook some beef with him so i left it. I let them talk and didn't stare at them or try to get involved in their conversations. It lasted for about 25 minutes and Brian came back to me only 5 minutes before we had to begin filming.
"So?" I asked. I acted casual, he didn't need to know that i felt dodgy about this situation. He came back happy and smiley so there was no need for me to tell him anything about Tyler to upset him.
"He's great. We're great. We're going on a date tomorrow night." He grinned. He was happy. I can still imagine his face, Honey, he had a huge smile plastered on him and he was giddy like a little boy.
"I'm happy for you!" I cheered before we both started jumping up and down like teenage girls. I pulled him in for a hug. I took a deep breath while in the hug but felt him squeeze me tight. When he was happy or when the hug was out of excitement, Brian would squeeze me a tiny bit tighter then usual. And he did. So he was happy.
After we had filmed, Brian and I were going to leave separately. I turned to look at Tyler before completely leaving the set. I am never going to deny how good looking he is. He is tan with a scruffy beard and curly dark hair. He had a clipboard in his hand and had a micro/ear phone contraption in his ear. I sighed very deeply as i realised our beef. Hm. I didn't really want beef with him. Fuck, I mean only a yesterday my crush on his was huge and he made me feel all weird inside but now i look at him and see a horrible person who makes Brian happy and i didn't know what to do about that.
While i stared at him, i noticed Brian approached him. I looked down and took a step back. I kept doing this, Honey, i kept involving myself in all this when i had no right. Ugh, i'm gross.
I looked down at my feet. I was waiting for them to finish their conversation so i could say goodbye to Brian before I left. A little best friend sappy ritual of ours. I couldn't leave him without saying goodbye! That breaks every rule of the best friend rule book.
"Hey Brian!" I looked up at Brian who was calling me. Bad thing is, however, he was still with Tyler. The man i have beef with. Fuck. "Come here!" He waved his hand and gestured for me to join them as they spoke.
On one hand, i did not want to go. Yet on the other hand, I had no choice. I couldn't exactly say 'No', now could I?
I walked towards them. "Hey." I said. I looked at Brian then quickly glanced at Tyler. I then looked down at my feet. I had done that a lot today. "What you guys talking about?" I asked in my usual cheery, gay tone. I didn't want Brian to recognise any weirdness from me so i tried to be as normal as possible. Tyler may be a bad boyfriend and let his hate for me get in the way of things but i was acting as a happy best friend to Brian, which is what i always will be.
"Nothing. Just about our date tomorrow. Just didn't want you waiting around so i thought i'd say bye and i'll see you later, yeah? Dinner at my house? I mean, if you can?" He asked, placing his hand on my shoulder.
See, Honey, I will always have the upper hand. I am Brian's best friend and no one and nothing will beat me as i reign. Okay, a bit far. Sorry.
"Yeah. Yeah, sure." I smiled, again looking down at my feet. I was being nervous and gross today. Ew.
Actually, as i write this i notice how nervous i actually have been recently with Brian. I wonder why. Hm, that's a problem for another time i guess.
Well anyways, I hugged Brian goodbye and left feeling on top of the world. Yes, he was still with Tyler and they were probably making out which did make me angry. I mean, my best friend fucking my ex crush who i now have beef with is kinda traumatic but there was nothing i could do right now.
Maybe i will talk to him about it at dinner. Maybe not. But speaking of dinner, it's time to leave to go to Brian's house now.
I'll update you tomorrow Honey!!!!!!!!
Love, Trixie.
